Song information On this page you can find the lyrics of the song Wtf Collective 3, artist - Jon LaJoie. Date of issue: 15.01.2012
Song language: English
Wtf Collective 3 |
| Yo! |
| MC Confusing! |
| WTF 3 motherfuckers! |
| Got more hamstrings than a pile of wings! |
| Bringing DVDs to a blind date! |
| First on the deck, Everyday Normal Guy! |
| Everyday Normal Guy here to get the track started |
| My average lyrics are between genius and retarded |
| I drink tap water and watch all the s |
| I put my 30-dollar pants on one leg at a time |
| Sleep eight hours a night, eat three meals a day |
| I’m motherfucking content, I have no reason to complain |
| I have a roof over my head and I got clothes on my back |
| My verse is done. |
| It wasn’t great, but hey, it wasn’t that bad |
| Yo, I’m MC Uses Time Machines Irresponsibly |
| Went back and found Judas Iscariot in 33AD |
| Gave him 31 pieces of silver to rat out the wrong guy |
| Then I planed monsanto seeds in dinosaur times |
| Gave Bill Gates my iPhone in 1973 |
| Then I traveled in time to the night I was conceived |
| I met up with my parents and we hung out all night |
| Come to think of it, they didn’t have any alone time |
| (No…) |
| MC Nauseous up in this montherfucker |
| I don’t feel so hot shit I think that I am gonna-- |
| (Bluurg!) |
| Why’m I so sick, what’d I eat? |
| Cat food will make expired yogurt taste less like cheese |
| (Oh right) |
| MC Cock-Blocks Himself, hey girl what’s up? |
| You so sexy, we should probably hook up |
| Crawl in a hot tub with a bottle of champagne |
| By the way, I have a girlfriend and I think I might have AIDS |
| (Where you going?) |
| MC Necrophiliac |
| Where are my dead bodies at? |
| Crashing funerals just so that I can get a whiff of that |
| Decomposing bodies, they’re my favorite aphrodisiac |
| Flatlining gives me a Pavlovian erection in my pants |
| Turn-offs include breathing, pulses, and signs of life |
| My turn-ons are rigor mortis, cold flesh, and suicide |
| If you’re not stiff as a board |
| I won’t be stiff and I’ll be bored |
| Wait, what do we have here? |
| Looks like I’m about to score |
| Wait a minute… no! |
| No! |
| No-- |
| You have to be kidding me! |
| (What the fuck’s going on?) |
| This cannot be happening |
| (I don’t wanna do this anymore!) |
| This must be a bad dream |
| (Leave me alone!) |
| Why am I still singing? |
| (I motherfucking killed myself!) |
| Yo, MC Gets Sidetracked Easily back in the heezy |
| By heezy I mean house but not the show, I think it’s cheesy |
| My favorite show is, that guy is also in 6 feet |
| Under my first experience with death when I was just sixteen |
| My dog got run over by a truck and its head exploded |
| Like Robert Patrick in when he’s frozen |
| It’s freezing in Iceland, I was just there on holiday |
| Hold on, I think I got lost again, what was I trying to say? |
| I was MC Who Couldn’t Speak In the Present Tense |
| I’m gonna have a lot of money and my dick was immense |
| It would’ve been difficult, people assumed I was a retard |
| I’ll have a serious problem, communicating was hard |
| Yo, I’m MC Constipation |
| It has been three days since |
| My last bowel movement, I’m starting to get impatient |
| Spent hours on the toilet, yet nothing ever comes out of it |
| Intestines like politicians, they’re constantly full of shit |
| I wish my bowel movements were a little more like my rhymes |
| Always smooth and free-flowing, it would save me a lot of time |
| Push for hours with no result, not even a brown Brussels sprout |
| My shit’s like a gay republican, it’s not planning on coming out |
| Yo, I’m MC Invisible, you can’t see me |
| The only rapper in this industry that can’t be seen |
| With the naked eye |
| I won’t lie |
| It’s hard to get a fanbase |
| When image is everything and I literally don’t have a face |
| I’m MC On the Phone With Ted Danson, keep it down! |
| Just skip to the next verse, I’m on the phone with Ted Danson! |
| Not now! |
| (Hold on, Ted) |
| I don’t wanna be in this song anymore, leave me alone! |
| This is more important--I'm on the phone with the guy who played Sam Malone! |
| Yo, I’m MC Confusing rapping up the song |
| Like a Plasticine high-fiving a helicopter thong |
| I got ricochet highlights |
| From the fleet fox’s knife guy |
| We out like a rice fighting |
| A vampire’s wife life |
| Maye this isn’t so bad |
| (Better than my last job) |
| Taking it in the ass for cash |
| (20 bucks a pop) |
| Maybe things will turn around |
| (Being a zombie’s pretty cool) |
| Things couldn’t get worse anyhow |
| Yeah, that’s right. |
| Oh you gonna get it, you little dead bitch. |
| No! |
| No! |
| Ow, ow, ow, ow, I spoke too soon. |
| Ugh, that used to be so gross! |
| It’s just a guy having sex with a dead body. |
| There’s nothing-- |
| (Bluurg!) |
| Dude, you just puked all over me! |
| Sorry. |
| That’s a good idea, I should get an enema. |
| Enemas, puke, guys having sex with dead bodies… you ready to go back to my |
| place? |
| Ugh! |
| What am I doing wrong? |
| Did I miss anything? |