| (My ex-girlfriend had a really weird fetish
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| Uh, she used to like to dress up as herself and then act like a fucking bitch
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| all the time)
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| My show is a little bit silly, and a
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| Little bit pretentious, so like
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| Shakespeare’s willy or
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| Noam Chomsky wearing a strap-on
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| It’s also a little bit gay, and a
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| Little bit offensive, like
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| Thanksgiving Day or
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| Noam Chomsky wearing a strap-on
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| So put your cellphones to vibrate
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| And put your vibrators to cellphone mode
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| Welcome to the show, it goes a little bit like this
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| Joke… exactly
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| Welcome to my flow, it flows a little bit like this
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| With a rap and a diss then a
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| Swift rap in the wrist, a rap in a kiss
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| Like Hershey’s wrappin' a Kiss, shit
|
| I got a show that’ll test you kids
|
| And it asks one question and the question is
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| What’s funny?
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| What’s funny, what’s funny, what’s funny?
|
| What’s funny, what’s funny, what’s funny?
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| Funny, fu-funny
|
| What’s funny?
|
| What’s funny, what’s funny, what’s funny?
|
| What’s funny, what’s funny, what’s funny?
|
| Funny
|
| Oh yeah
|
| Humor is often linked to shared experience
|
| Like a guy gets up and says, «Have you noticed that public restrooms have
|
| really inefficient hand dryers? |
| ««Oh my God, yes I have
|
| Ha ha ha ha, really good point
|
| They should fix that
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| It’s good to know that somebody finally gets me
|
| 'Cause my wife divorced me
|
| Which has consciously forced me to lose all sense of self
|
| So it’s nice to think about hand dryers
|
| And not that cheating whore»
|
| Because stand-up comedy is actually pretty easy
|
| If you’re an Asian comic, just get up and say, «My mother’s got the weirdest
|
| fucking accent»
|
| Then just do a Chinese accent
|
| 'Cause everybody laughs at the Chinese accent
|
| Because they privately thought that your people were laughable and now you’ve
|
| given them the chance to express that in public
|
| Ah yeah, if you’re a musical comic
|
| Just give them a little weird voice inflection
|
| Then take a Viagra
|
| And slap them with a rock-hard misdirection
|
| What’s funny?
|
| What’s funny, what’s funny, what’s funny?
|
| What’s funny, what’s funny, what’s funny?
|
| Funny, fu-funny
|
| … Tourettes!
|
| What’s funny?
|
| What’s funny, what’s funny, what’s funny?
|
| What’s funny, what’s funny, what’s funny?
|
| Funny
|
| Oh, and the audience says
|
| When I was a baby, maybe I laughed at people jiggling keys
|
| Now I’m older and bolder and just get mad because I notice that the keys are to
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| a Hummer
|
| Fuck my life, I don’t fuck my wife
|
| So fuck my wife, and fuck my life
|
| And my son is gay, but not sitcom gay
|
| Daughter’s a whore, like another girl that used to be her mother
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| But the marriage made her Miss Mary Americana
|
| I want a teen, but that’s screaming prima donna
|
| But the radical feminists made my wife a man
|
| Oh, and if I die happy
|
| The situation
|
| Will be auto-erotic
|
| Asphyxiation
|
| I hate my life and it hates me back
|
| And my friend is black
|
| But I don’t know what to call him
|
| So I just call him
|
| … What up, Jamal?
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| Even though his name is Steve
|
| I hate my job, I hate my life
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| I hate my kids, I hate my wife
|
| Jews would know I do it
|
| Judas beat me to it
|
| I’m slowly slipping into a solipsistic coma
|
| And I masturbate because I’m the only one whose standards are low enough to
|
| fuck me!
|
| What’s funny?
|
| What’s funny, what’s funny, what’s funny?
|
| What’s funny, what’s funny, what’s funny?
|
| Funny, fu-funny
|
| (Pop) It’s a boy
|
| What’s funny?
|
| What’s funny, what’s funny, what’s funny?
|
| What’s funny, what’s funny, what’s funny?
|
| Funny, yeah
|
| Hopefully this
|
| (Fart) |
Song information On this page you can read the lyrics of the song WHAT'S FUNNY , by - Bo Burnham. Song from the album Words Words Words, in the genre