| Who’s the greatest person who ever lived?
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| It’s me!
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| Everybody else sucks
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| I’ve got a Grammy and four top ten hits
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| Clearly
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| That makes me the best
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| This is the most self-centered
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| And obnoxious song ever heard
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| Why would you want to be yourself?
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| You should be me and no one else
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| You suck
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| Ugh look at you!
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| What is wrong with me?
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| You need a new red hairdo
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| And a giraffe hood too
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| Here take these dudes
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| Hey are you trying to make us look just like you?
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| Yes!
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| But we don’t want to!
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| If you don’t want to be me
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| You must be a real dummy
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| Here wear these robes that are pink
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| And sing into these like me
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| Everyone but me is flawed
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| So you should all quit your jobs
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| And become entertainers
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| Just like me Meghan Trainor
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| What are you trying to do?
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| Please stop!
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| To make you more like me not you
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| You suck!
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| We can’t work Meghan please stop it!
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| But you both are total dog shit
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| I’m great
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| What’s wrong with these people who cannot see
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| That they should want to be
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| Just exactly like me?
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| Hold on, Meghan
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| I believe that I can
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| Help them to understand
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| Quick please tell me your plan
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| I’m working on this machine
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| That can map out all of your genes
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| Then any creature that walks in
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| Will come out a clone of Meghan
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| Hell yeah
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| You you and you prepare to be improved
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| Step up and walk right through
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| Come on you go through too!
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| This is so great
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| Everyone has my face
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| The world’s a better place
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| You saved the human race
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| Now I can see
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| Just what love really means
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| That’s why now I’m asking
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| Will you all marry me? |