Song information On this page you can find the lyrics of the song Cold Showers, artist - Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Cast. Date of issue: 09.06.2016
Song language: English
Cold Showers |
| There’s nothing I love more in life |
| Than a scalding hot shower |
| It’s the symbol of human dignity |
| That separates us from the chimps |
| Helps you scrub off the sleep and scrub on the day |
| Or scrub off the day, and scrub on the sleep |
| Don’t know if you’re morning or night shower people |
| Whatever floats your boat |
| But where are your toddlers gonna float their boats |
| If all you have is cold H₂O? |
| That’s two parts hydrogen, one part oxygen |
| And zero parts justice! |
| Now I know you’re thinking |
| «What are you talking about? |
| Go away, this is private property!» |
| Well, before we leave, ladies and gents |
| Allow me to set the scene: ima— |
| Yeah, I don’t live here. |
| Oh. |
| Imagine your kids taking a shower before they go to school |
| They douse their skin with ice cold water |
| A huge shock to their little systems |
| At first it’s downright unpleasant, but then |
| It gets them wired in a way they’ve never felt |
| And they think to themselves: |
| «That shower felt great, maybe I’ll try cocaine!» |
| So your son’s on coke, your daughter’s pregnant |
| And your husband’s probably having an affair |
| Apocalypse! |
| Just like the movie I Am Legend |
| But not like that at all |
| No hot water |
| Which means cold showers |
| Next thing you know |
| Your kids will be on crack |
| No hot water |
| Which means cold showers! |
| Which everyone knows |
| Is the gateway drug to crack |
| Crack, crack, crack |
| Now, it’s not just about the hot water, folks. |
| If this landlord isn’t taking |
| one measly hour out of his day to fix your showers, then what’s this scumbag |
| doing with all your hard earned cash? |
| He’s taking it and blowing it in a hand of Pai Gow at the Indian casino! |
| He’s fat-catting it at fancy restaurants like The Olive Garden |
| And Red Lobster! |
| Gasp is right! |
| That’s gasp with an uppercase G |
| That ends with a P the first letter in pool! |
| Crack, crack, crack, crack |
| Crack, crack, crack, crack |
| Crack, crack, crack, crack |
| Crack, crack, crack, crack |
| Crack, crack, crack, crack |
| Crack, crack, crack, crack |
| Crack, crack, crack, crack |
| Crack, crack, crack, crack |
| Crack, crack, crack, crack |
| Crack, crack, crack, crack |
| Crack, crack, crack, crack |
| Crack— |
| No hot water |
| No hot water |
| Which means cold showers |
| Next thing you know your kids will be on crack! |
| This makes sense! |
| No hot water |
| Means cold, cold showers |
| And cold showers are the gateway drug |
| To crack |
| Cold water is drugs! |
| Yeah! |