Lyrics JAP Battle [Reprise] - Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Cast, Rachel Bloom, Rachel Grate

JAP Battle [Reprise]

All of our lives you were toxic
Obnoxious
Now though, you’ve brought me from nauseous to naches
I’m proud of you, Bunch
You’re a grown-up, you got this
Kol hakavod, you’re a goddess
Me?!
But you’re so responsible
Career’s on sizzle
Husband, ditto
Three great kiddos
You’ve got competence, class
Plus a skinny-ass waist
And a toned-ass ass
Well, you’ve got a free spirit, which I see and commend
So, like 2 Chainz without the «NZ» at the end
I wish you double chai
For following the tug
Of the heart behind your 36 triple-D jugs
Wow, what a boost for my confidence!
Yeah, I mean, I gotta give it up
I’m pretty good at giving compliments
Nice bubble, Bubbeleh, I really hate to pop it
But nobody’s got a plaudit any hotter than I drop it
This is…
A JAP praise fight
Half affirmation
Half cage fight
Killing you with kindness
Yeah, you’re dang right
It’s a head-to-head yasher koach mazel tov off
You know what?
Let’s squash it, you’re awesome
Seconded!
Same!
Rebecca-wise, my game recognize game
Thanks, I appreciate that
Yeah, I mean, there’s a reason I’m called «Esteem queen Levine»
Can it with the accolades-slash-shade-catapulting
You are the one who is great at adulting
All your hard work, ultimately resulting in triumph
Damn, that’s some sneaky insulting
Skip the emotional judo
I am the B. Knowles-Carter of kudos
I’m the Lebron James of acclaim
Then you might as well call me the Michelle of the kvell
Go to hell!
This is…
A JAP cheer scrimmage
Like a rap battle
But the mirror image
Both of us’ll feel great
When we’re finished
Giving a dope-slap of dap to this JAP…
(Spoken)
Which does stand for Jewish-American Princess, a term that, on one hand,
does reinforce negative, negative stereotypes about both Jews and women but,
on the other hand, is a term that we want to reclaim and own.
Also,
should acknowledge that me saying «dap to this jap» is appropriative and a
little problematic, if we’re being honest
(Sung)
This is touchy stuff and it’s pretty complicated
But I noticed the dynamic and I thought that I should name it
Just like I hated you, but now I kinda like you
This song’s another thing I can see two sides to
Terrific self-awareness
Knock it off, Audra!
You never stop, do you?
Can’t and don’t wanna
You’re a wonderful lady
But an insufferable baby
Should we make out?
What?!
No!
Maybe…