Lyrics Connie Watson - Trevor Moore

Connie Watson

Connie Watson
Is my mom’s best friend
She’s sixty-two
And she loves Land’s End.
Her hair is short
And always looks wet.
She works reception
For the local vet.
And everytime I’m home she tells me stories all day long.
She says her life is crazy and I should put her in a song.
Connie, Connie
Connie Watson
Here you go.
This is a song for you.
For your crazy tales and anecdotes.
She swears all this is true!
One time Connie
Went to TGI Friday’s
With a bunch of ladies
From church!
They thought the waiter was cute
Because he looked like a young Matt Lauer
And when he came over
His name tag said Matt
Connie, Connie
Connie Watson
Frumpy lady, a mystery and such
The craziest things just seem to happen to her
You can’t make this stuff up
A guy at Kroger
Once thought that Connie was his wife
But when she turned around
He was wrong.
But I can’t do it justice.
I must not be telling the story right.
Because when Connie does
It’s forty-five minutes long.
Connie, Connie
Connie Watson
How do you like your stupid song?
Is it everything that you thought it would be?
Everybody sing along!
Connie
I think you might have a non-verbal learning disorder.
Because you clearly have trouble interpreting people’s social cues.
Connie
If someone hasnt responded in 20 minutes.
Then they won’t look up from their phone
That means they don’t want to talk to you.
Connie
I think you might have a non-verbal learning disorder.
Because you clearly have trouble interpreting people’s social cues.
Connie
If someone hasnt responded in 20 minutes.
Then they won’t look up from their phone
That means they don’t want to talk to you.
Connie where you at tonight?
Are you at Panera Bread?
Connie where you at tonight?
Are you at Panera Bread?
She’s got a sweatshirt
Of cats unrolling a roll of toilet paper.
In the bathroom
And it says «Let the good times roll.»
She’s got a sweatshirt
Of cats unrolling a roll of toilet paper.
In the bathroom
And it says «Let the good times roll.»
She’s got a sweatshirt
Of cats unrolling a roll of toilet paper.
In the bathroom
And it says «Let the good times roll.»