| I took very long walks with my scary pet tiger
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| We’d have very long talks, so many topics to decipher
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| We were new at existence but our discussions seemed timeless
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| Whether speeding down a hill or pretending that we’re pirates
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| Every Calvin needs a Derkins, of that I’m sadly certain
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| You walked into the room, they looked at you and I looked nervous
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| Tried to shake it off, told myself that I’m a millionaire
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| Music producer, but this juicer had a killer pair
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| Of eyes, surprise, she’s headed this way
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| We fell in love. |
| For a year, we did date
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| But she was so focused and I was out of frame
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| Then we just broke up because I couldn’t take the pain
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| She was just a bigger deal, my ego’s emo, havin' feels
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| She’s writing songs talking trash, is this girl f’real?
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| Then I thought that shit was done, turns out it ain’t over yet
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| Triggered 'cause her IG showed her turtleneck is shoulderless
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| I still love you
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| But, babe, gotta say, you’re still a mystery
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| I miss Hobbes, dude
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| We were so tight, now I must fight all Nazis
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| I still love you
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| But, babe, gotta say, you’re still a mystery
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| I miss Hobbes, dude
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| We were so tight, now I must fight all Nazis
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| Taylor’s about as country as the state of Pennsylvania
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| But everywhere is country, not just South with its regalia
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| Cities are so self involved, they can’t see past their ponds
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| Liberals fail to understand that this isn’t Coruscant
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| 90 minutes out of Philly, she grew up on a farm
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| They grew pretty Christmas trees and they sold them in a barn
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| Her father worked in finance, they all were hella rich
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| She made 'em move to Nashville to get signed and make it big
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| She made it saying, «Look at me, I’m such a geek
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| I wear these funny glasses, boys don’t like to watch me weep
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| I’m just like Juliet, that basic bitch from English Lit
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| Now everybody bow down, say I am the shit.»
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| Now she’s the richest person, her philanthropies unmatched
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| Got no problem being vocal, cool with doling out the cash
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| Kept quiet couple years ago, she could’ve okayed Clinton
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| She doesn’t talk 'bout politics as if that shit’s forbidden
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| So you didn’t pick a side, Miley’s crying over Hillary
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| You can’t deny you spent more time pickin' out your jewelry
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| You made a clever posed, revealed your vote in code
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| If you were gonna do that, why did… Come on, Taylor!
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| Concerts are classrooms
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| We coulda taught them how to V-O-T-E
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| Babies in cages
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| You could have saved us, you only fight when you lose money
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| Concerts are classrooms
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| We coulda taught them how to V-O-T-E
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| Babies in cages
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| You could have saved us, you only fight when you lose money
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| Donald was delivered or should I say extracted
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| His mother never loved him, always seemed kind of distracted
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| Was ill when he was little, when he needed mommy most
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| They were never reunited, was divided from the host
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| Threw cake at birthday parties, liked to play hooky
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| Shipped him off to military school with no cookies
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| Donald was a derelict, almost killed a kid
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| So they said goodbye forever and I bet they’re glad they did
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| When he got out of college, he dodged the draft
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| Inherited his dad’s business and kicked out the blacks
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| Put his brand on every manse like a rancher gone mad
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| Known to take advantage of his workers and his staff
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| 40 years go past, three wives, five kids
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| Cameo in Home Alone, game show host for kicks
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| Decides to run for office, only he has all the answers
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| Now we’re all afraid his mother couldn’t love the bastard
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| They can call us snowflakes, they can call us cucks
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| But they’re not the people being loaded into trucks
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| In 2020, Taylor, make sure your girls get it
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| If you’re not voting Democrat, you vote for Armageddon
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| Foxy Nazi
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| Can’t you see that these kids look up to you?
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| Foxy Nazi
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| Next time pick a side, losing abortion rights thanks to you
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| Foxy Nazi
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| Can’t you see that these kids look up to you?
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| Foxy Nazi
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| Next time pick a side, losing abortion rights thanks to you |