| Here’s the kicker name is Glicker, son of Selma and Mel
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| My persnickety parents are my own version of hell
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| They’re always grouchy cause I’m slouching you know I’m covered in dirt
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| I know they only love me but sometimes love really hurts
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| I didn’t wanna go to camp it was disgusting and damn
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| But my heart stared soaring saw this Victorian vamp
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| They were not like the others, her and her brother
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| Her dour demeanor defeated me I immediately loved her
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| I wouldn’t build a birdhouse, I wouldn’t ride a horse
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| Allergic to archery and terrified of tennis courts
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| Wasn’t interested in crafts unless we’re talkin bout witches
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| Fuck Amanda Buckman and her brood of blonde bitches
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| They insisted I visit her hut for reading Hawking
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| I tried to act nonchalant, her hotness got me gawking
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| I worshiped and adored her, I would be her devoted slave
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| I would let her have her way until she put me in my grave
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| She’s so extra cute, her face electrocutes
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| Aim a crossbow at your throat and that’s the end of you
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| Not prone to teenage tantrums, she’s not a dream or phantom
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| Her name is Wednesday Addams, this is my Wednesday Anthem
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| Say Wednesday’s child is warmness (?) full of woe
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| Her feet are sweet but did you know that one has six toes
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| She’s the unholy maggot that’s always feasting on my soul
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| Total fan of soft rock (?)and she’s completely lost control
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| She’s pale, got pigtails and two eyes so wide
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| Homicide’s on her mind all the time and that’s fine
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| Dressed like someone died but I think that’s just her style
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| She acts like she don’t like me but I think that’s just denial
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| Now I’m no longer languid, my life lost in daydream
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| She hated everybody before it went mainstream
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| Got a serious collection of serial killer trading cards
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| But I’d trade my whole collection for a connection with her heart
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| Got a message in my mail «Meet at the skeleton after dark»
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| Got invited to a wedding, it’s not a date but it’s a start
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| I wonder if she cares, will we kiss before we part?
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| Underestimated her enemy let’s be sweet beneath the stars
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| Others glare and get a sense of ominous dread
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| I think she’s cute I want to cuddle in her octopus bed
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| Other campers think they’re cunning but she leaves them running scared
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| She’ll always be my Pocahontas and I’ll be her Running Bear
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| These teens seem prim and proper but they’re rotten and they’re mean
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| But she’s Gomez Addams' daughter they ought to get in her guillotine
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| These privileged young adults are fault and some are kind of teens (?)
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| They fail to see her greatness, their lameness is whats obscene
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| She says she doesn’t hug, her and her brother are contagious
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| But I somehow fell in love with this poison sipping Pagan
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| Must be practicing witchcraft I’m compelled by Cupid’s Curse
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| She’s frightful and delightful my heart is rightfully hers
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| Burnt their village to the ground, decided I wanted to stab one (?)
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| Parted ways and seventh grade would split us like an atom
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| Her hero’s a witch burned in 1706, my hero’s the girl I love a little witch in
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| Winterfixed (?) |