Lyrics Plain Plate of Noodles - John Mulaney

Plain Plate of Noodles

I hate to make a scene at a restaurant
But there’s only one meal that I ever want
Just noodles with butter and not too much
And they have to be the tube kind or I won’t touch
We were once on a cruise and the waiters got to know me
Before my family ordered, they would bring me macaroni
A plain plate of noodles with a little bit of butter
But life in a cruise ship, it’s a boat without a rudder, yeah
Plain plate of noodles with a little bit of butter
It’s the only thing I’ll eat
I’ve tried steak and chicken and lots of different fishes
But I just want my noodles even though they’re not nutritious
They say be myself and live the life I want
Except when I want noodles at a fancy restaurant
I know that I’m not normal, I feel alone and lonely
I’m the only livin' boy who just wants macaroni
I just want macaroni
Just a plain plate of noodles with a little bit of butter
'Cause I tried every food and haven’t liked another
Plain plate of noodles with a little bit of butter is the only thing I’ll eat
And on my wedding day while my bride is eatin' lobster
Will I still be saying, «Can I please just have some pasta?»
A plain plate of noodles with a little bit of butter
I’ve tried every food and I haven’t liked another
A plain plate of noodles with a little bit of butter
It’s the only thing I’ll eat
Just a plain plate of noodles
A plain plate of noodles
A plain plate of noodles
A plain plate of noodles
A plain plate of noodles with a little bit of butter
A plain plate of noodles with a little bit of butter
A plain plate of noodles with a little bit of butter
'Cause I’ve tried every food
He’s tried every food
Lord, I’ve tried every food
He’s tried every food
And I haven’t liked another
It’s the only thing I’ll eat