Translation of the song lyrics Rattoisa Humppa - Eläkeläiset

Rattoisa Humppa (original)

Mieluummin häissä ku hautajaisissani olisin
Tosiaankin olisin häissäni
Mieluummin baarissa kun kirkossa olisin
Tosiaankin olisin baarissa
Mieluummin kossua ku vissyä vetäisin
Kaksinkäsin vetäisin kossua
Mieluummin hutikassa ku selvänä olisin
Tosiaankin olisin hutikassa
Lai-lai-lai-lai-la-lai-lai-lai-lai-lai
Lai-lai-lai lai-lai-lai
Lai-lai-lai-lai-la-lai-lai-lai-lai-lai
Lai-lai-lai lai-lai-lai lai-lai-lai
Mieluummin mieli puussa kuin maassa olisin
Tosiaankin olisin puussa
Mieluummin rattoa ku raamattua lukisin
Tosiaankin lukisin rattoa kaksinkäsin
Lai-lai-lai-lai-la-lai-lai-lai-lai-lai
Lai-lai-lai lai-lai-lai
Lai-lai-lai-lai-la-lai-lai-lai-lai-lai
Lai-lai-lai lai-lai-lai lai-lai-lai
Mieluummin pöpinä ku pipinä olisin
Tosiaankin olisin pöpinä
Lai-lai-lai-la-lai-lai-lai-lai-lai
Lai-lai-lai lai-lai-lai
Lai-lai-lai-lai-la-lai-lai-lai-lai-lai
Lai-lai-lai lai-lai-lai lai-lai-lai

(translation)

I'd rather be at my wedding funeral
Indeed, I would be at my wedding
I'd rather be at the bar than I would be at church
Indeed, I would be at the bar
I'd rather go than I could
I would pull the suit with both hands
I'd rather be clear
Indeed, I would be in a hut
To-to-be-to-be-to-be-to-be-to-be
To-so-to so-to-so
To-to-be-to-be-to-be-to-be-to-be
To-to-be-to-to-be-to-so
I would rather mind in a tree than on the ground
Indeed, I would be in a tree
I would rather read the bible than the Bible
Indeed, I would read the wheel with both hands
To-to-be-to-be-to-be-to-be-to-be
To-so-to so-to-so
To-to-be-to-be-to-be-to-be-to-be
To-to-be-to-to-be-to-so
I'd rather be a bitch
Indeed, I would be a jerk
To-to-be-to-be-to-be-to-be-to-be
To-so-to so-to-so
To-to-be-to-be-to-be-to-be-to-be
To-to-be-to-to-be-to-so