| I dated Siamese twins
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| I slept with Bigfoot, too
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| Get me on Sally Jesse
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| Put me on Donahue
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| 'Cause I wanna tell the world about it Right Now
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| My dog’s a narcoleptic
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| My mom’s a circus freak
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| I gotta get a spot on Geraldo’s show this week
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| 'Cause I wanna tell the world about it Right Now
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| I’m just an anorexic codependant bingo addict
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| Stripper born without a chin
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| And I’m only comfortable talking about it When the whole wide world is listening in Talk Soup… Talk Soup
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| Listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me My wife ran off with Elvis
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| My boss shaved off my hair
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| I’ve got a thing for poodles
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| And rubber underwear
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| And I wanna tell the world about it Right Now
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| I had a close encounter
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| I never chew my food
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| I got eleven nose jobs
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| I yodel in the nude
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| And I wanna tell the world about it Right Now
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| I’m just a cross-dressin' alcoholic neo-Nazi
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| Porno star, as you may have guessed
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| And I’m really gonna feel a whole lot better
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| If you let me get this thing off my chest
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| Talk Soup… Talk Soup
|
| Listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me
|
| I’m just your average schizophrenic nymphomaniac
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| Albino go-go dancer, you see
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| Nothin' so bad that I can’t share it With a billion friends on national TV, whoa…
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| I have no genitalia
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| I sold my kids for cheese
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| I love my blow up doll, so Bring out those cameras, please
|
| 'Cause I wanna tell the world about it Right Now
|
| Talk Soup… Talk Soup
|
| Listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me Talk Soup… Talk Soup
|
| Listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me Talk Soup… Talk Soup
|
| Listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me Talk Soup… Talk Soup
|
| Listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me |