Song information On this page you can find the lyrics of the song Amish Paradise, artist - "Weird Al" Yankovic.
Date of issue: 29.07.2021
Song language: English
Amish Paradise |
As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain |
I take a look at my wife and realize she’s very plain |
But that’s just perfect for an Amish like me |
You know, I shun fancy things like electricity |
At 4:30 in the mornin' I’m milkin' cows |
Jebediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows, fool |
And I’ve been milkin' and plowin' so long that |
Even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone |
I’m a man of the land, I’m into discipline |
Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin |
But if I finish all of my chores, and you finish thine |
Then tonight we’re gonna party like it’s 1699 |
We been spending most our lives |
Living in an Amish paradise |
I’ve churned butter once or twice |
Living in an Amish paradise |
It’s hard work and sacrifice |
Living in an Amish paradise |
We sell quilts at discount price |
Living in an Amish paradise |
A local boy kicked me in the butt last week |
I just smiled at him and I turned the other cheek |
I really don’t care, in fact I wish him well |
'Cause I’ll be laughing my head off when he’s burning in Hell |
But I ain’t never punched a tourist even if he deserved it |
An Amish with a 'tude? |
You know that’s unheard of |
I never wear buttons but I got a cool hat |
And my homies agree, I really look good in black, fool |
If you come to visit, you’ll be bored to tears |
We haven’t even paid the phone bill in 300 years |
But we ain’t really quaint, so please don’t point and stare |
We’re just technologically impaired |
There’s no phone, no lights, no motorcar |
Not a single luxury |
Like Robinson Crusoe |
It’s as primitive as can be |
We been spending most our lives |
Living in an Amish paradise |
We’re just plain and simple guys |
Living in an Amish paradise |
There’s no time for sin and vice |
Living in an Amish paradise |
We don’t fight, we all play nice |
Living in an Amish paradise |
Hitchin' up the buggy, churning lots of butter |
Raised a barn on Monday, soon I’ll raise another |
Think you’re really righteous? |
Think you’re pure in heart? |
Well, I know I’m a million times as humble as thou art |
I’m the pious guy the little Amlettes wanna be like |
On my knees day and night scoring points for the afterlife |
So don’t be vain and don’t be whiny |
Or else, my brother, I might have to get medieval on your heinie |
We been spending most our lives |
Living in an Amish paradise |
We’re all crazy Mennonites |
Living in an Amish paradise |
There’s no cops and traffic lights |
Living in an Amish paradise |
But you’d probably think it bites |
Living in an Amish paradise |
(Oooooh Ooooooh… yech!) |