| Ferris wheels and bumper cars are fun
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| But those rides just aren’t for everyone
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| Bought my ticket I’ma have a run
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| In the maze (WHOOOO!)
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| If I don’t come back or right away
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| Give me time at least a half a day
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| Don’t just leave me lost and blown away
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| In the maze (WHOOOO!)
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| Hello ladies and gentlemen I’m Jeff Nipple
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| And I’m Jimbo Jizm
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| Welcome to the Dark Carnival’s amazing maze
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| Over 5000 ways to get in, and no way out
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| Let’s meet today’s volunteer
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| This is Rick
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| We like to call him Rick the Dick
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| Dickface here is a wealthy entrepeneur
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| Who smacks his wife around
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| And buys his way in and out of everything
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| Let’s see how Mr. Toughguy fairs up in the amazing maze
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| What up bitch? |
| I’m Violent J
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| I’ll be your guide for today, k?
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| Good, got mad doors and mad floors
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| Hallways, crawlways, walls for nedens
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| Make a left just before you make a right
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| And your left should be to your right
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| If your lefts right, right?
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| Good, begin the show
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| Go on ahead boy and open up the first door
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| Welcome to a theatrical thriller
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| Meet Jack Doobie a serial killer
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| With a chainsaw, he takes your arm at the elbow
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| You get it back if you make it out though
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| Fuck ain’t no use crying all day
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| You need to take your bitch ass back down the hallway
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| You gotta be a man at least you learned
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| Everything you get in the maze you’ve earned
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| Keep runnin times a tickin on the clock
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| You might wanna tie that stump up with a sock
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| Turn right it might look the same
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| But you makin tracks through the room of thumbtacks
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| This really ain’t shit
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| About a million tacks and the room spins a bit
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| If you stay on your feet you’ll be okay
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| Oh let me get out of your way
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| Oh boy Rick the Dick is in a bit of a jam there Jeff
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| That’s right Jimbo
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| He looks like a ragdoll flippin and spinnin like that
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| You can always witness spectacles truly amazing
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| Within the amazing maze
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| Let’s see where else Rick’s adventures
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| Will lead the little dickwipe
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| Hahaha, so you got a few tacks in your balls
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| Pick 'em all out and head right back down the halls
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| What’s this? |
| Dead end, doors locked
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| It’s a long way back, just knock
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| Oh should’ve turned around no doubt
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| Ain’t nuthin that we got to sit and argue about
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| Keep going make a left, right left
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| Now run straight ahead some more
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| Open up the door
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| Slide in the sheets, nice breeze
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| Relax ninja take it with ease
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| The maze is a place of magic
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| Many surprises, your dick rises
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| Lay down expect the best
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| In comes your lover with a hairy chest
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| Hello sexy I’m grim love
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| Let me have a look at your uhh milk dud
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| Aww shit you fell for that
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| I ain’t gonna tell you got your hole ring tapped
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| All that dissin of the opposite sex
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| And look who just got they butthole flexed
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| Wait! |
| What’s that?
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| The walls are closing in, fuck dat
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| Hurry run for your life
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| Ohh he’ll be alright
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| How’s that sit with you Jimbo?
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| First he gets plugged with bullets
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| Then he gets his butt plugged
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| I think he’s a fuckin idiot, Jeff
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| I mean what kind of asshole
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| Can’t find his way out of this maze?
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| You gotta be a real dickbuffer
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| To wind up here in the first place
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| Right you are Jimbo
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| Let’s watch the big dick fuck up some more
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| Alrighty ain’t no need to fear
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| If there’s a way out it’s gotta be near
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| Hey yo look a phone
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| You still got one good arm so it’s on Can you hear? |
| Ahh tongue in your ear
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| Drop it the phones got a life of it’s own
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| Kiss me man hey come on Slip down the slide go faster
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| Bed of nails, disaster
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| Quit screaming yo, hurry the fuck up and open the door
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| Woods, trees you’re outside
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| Lots of places for creeps to hide
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| Watch your step, AHHHH, backdraft
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| Caught your foot and the ankles left
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| Creepin off with your stump
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| Feel something in the rump
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| Holla’s, yeah they gonna get you
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| How does it feel bitch get the picture
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| Back indoors hey at last
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| Look at your family behind the glass
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| They look weird, they’re sayin something
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| Listen up, you’ve fucked up, you’ve fucked up Oooh they’re laughin and they’re pointing at you
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| At least you know what they’re sayins true
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| It’s one last door you made it home, or Or what? |
| Once again it’s on Ferris wheels and bumper cars are fun
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| But those rides just aren’t for everyone
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| Bought my ticket I’ma have a run
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| In the maze (WHOOOO!)
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| If I don’t come back or right away (Hey)
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| Hey man cut that shit
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| What the fuck man, happy friendly shit man
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| Fuck dat
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| It’s supposed to be wicked in this bitch man
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| Turn that shit off |