| Downloadable content’s a load of nonsense
|
| I won’t give them one cent
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| It wouldn’t be conscientious
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| Encouraging dodgy ventures
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| Like when you’ve been robbed
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| Do you get your property straight back from the fences?
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| I wanna know what the defence is
|
| Hence this musical census
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| Pay attention to community consensus
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| To prevent this backlash of hashtags
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| And truly contentious lambasts, e.g.
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| «I hope you’re shoving your Prothean
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| Up your fallopian»
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| No wonder the planet’s becoming dystopian
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| Draconian Napoleons invoking pandemonium
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| And I might be blowin' my own euphonium
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| By «in' this
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| But I know I’m not the only one that’s pissed
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| My data’s trapped inside the disc
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| Sat in lines of script
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| And I have to pay to take it out
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| What kind of shit is this?
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| It’s the DLC PLC
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| Where we make money sellin' people
|
| Things that were free
|
| Welcome to the DLC PLC
|
| Where we charge you for things
|
| You bought previously
|
| No need to be dishonest
|
| The incompleted product’s a piece of bollocks
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| So please give me the pieces of it
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| And leave my wallet, I need the dollars
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| But don’t be extremely bothered
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| I’ll probably buy the sequel of it
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| 'Cause that’s the key
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| The reason it keeps on happening, it’s obvious
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| If you pay them quids they take the piss
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| And get away with it
|
| Until they’re pinchin' all your paper
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| Like a paperclip
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| «And what would our forefathers
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| Have thought of horse armor?
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| It’s all rather an awful palaver
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| Perhaps I should make a call and talk to Obama»
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| You’re causing drama
|
| And according to the laws of karma
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| Stir the water, sure enough
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| Of course you’ll taunt the poor piranhas
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| So try to pull my jaws apart
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| I’m sure you can’t
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| I’m sinkin' my teeth into the greed
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| Inherently buried in DLC things
|
| Hidden fees and prices surprising me like bee stings
|
| «Is it any wonder we punters are seething»
|
| At the DLC PLC
|
| Where we make money sellin' people
|
| Things that were free
|
| Welcome to DLC PLC
|
| Where we charge you for things
|
| You bought previously
|
| I’m sorry, but Verse 3 is only available in the Premium version of this song
|
| If you would like to acquire the Premium version
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| Then please bend over with your VISA, American Express or MasterCard lodged
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| tightly between your buttocks
|
| Thank you for your continued loyalty
|
| From everybody
|
| At the DLC PLC
|
| Where we make money sellin'
|
| People things that were free
|
| Welcome to DLC PLC
|
| Where we charge you for things
|
| You bought previously
|
| The DLC PLC
|
| The DLC PLC
|
| Downloadable content… what is it? |
| What use does it have? |
| What function does
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| it serve? |
| I mean, obviously I know the answer, but it’s a sort of rhetorical
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| question I suppose. |
| So maybe you think about it whether… whether it’s good
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| for the gaming community, whether it’s good for the industry, what your
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| thoughts about it are. |
| I’m very keen to know! |