Lyrics Steamworld Quest (The Epic Rap of Gilgamech) - Dan Bull

Steamworld Quest (The Epic Rap of Gilgamech)

Attention, adventurer!
Fetch a couple of friends at once
And then come up to the entrance of my den the one with the pretentious front
See my intention is to send you on a journey
Just sign here, here and here, no need to pester your attorney
I can assure you all it’s all above board, ensuring your return
It’s all insured and after all I’m sure you can all afford a gurney
Right then, who’s ready for excitement?
Who’s very good at delicately repelling furry pikemen?
Excelling when you fight them, dishing out heroic strikes
No crying either, I require my hires to be the stoic type
And go in like the clappers, arms flailing like some nineties rappers
Hyped up to slap whatever surprise attackers might come at us
Psychopathic type, to grab a tiger by the knackers
Stare him right in the eye and sigh «pff, like it matters»
Crikey, that was quite a tangent, let me wind it back a tad
I’m combining violent acts with grinding knights and baccarat
My new type of battle rap, thrice as nice as past examples
We three are the real deal, you’re manufactured plastic samples
I’m basked in candlelight, casting magic from fantastic angles
Like hammers smacking anvils so fast
Your wider family’s entire future, present and their past is canceled
I know that has to rankle, but show me that you’re thankful
And I might just let you leave the table breathing
Without the need for fatal beatings to alleviate your evil deeds
We are by far the hardest
Of ménage à trois this side of Mars
No need to mine for gold now, we’re bringing giant bars
You can’t be coming in our town and chucking your cards down
You just interrupted a game, look this is my round
So shut up and be quiet now, before you get sparked out
'Cause every crustacean’s just made of mush under that hard shell
We’ll fight peasants, knights, kings crying «guards, help»
While we rain fire down and shout «where are your gods now?»
But you know what?
There’s more to us than all the pain we’re dealing
What about the pain we’re feeling, too, that pain needs healing
There’s only so much strain a lone brain can take and keep in
From the nascent morning’s warm rays to evening
Before the walls will break and all the caged frustration seeps in
We’re waist deep in freezing water that won’t wait to deepen
Each of us believes we’re alone in separated pieces
But this way of thinking’s way too frequent, so we need to change the sequence
We need to speak to mates that we relate to who may be feeling
Each as isolated and unappreciated and drained of meaning
It’s a way to vent and ventilate, the steam you may be breathing
Put together we can overcome our heads and slay the demons
Make a team, cooperate, collaborate cohesively
And we will take on what we face and beat the danger easily
Trivia, you can’t spell steam without team
Facts, you can’t expect help without saying «help me»
Without being down to help out with the helping
And you can’t be down to help out without helping
And you can’t help out without helping yourself
Here’s a helping of self-help, stop doubting yourself now
'Cause if you can’t help doubting I doubt the doubt’s helping
But anyway, I digress
This song’s about steamworld quest