| Last night, I got so high
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| I think I had sex with the cable guy
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| Well I’ll admit, it would’ve been funny
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| But, that pole smoker stole all my drug money
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| I buy chronic every week or so
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| But I do it when I’m really really high on blow
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| I’m wide awake, but it’s hard to count
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| I paid $ 1100 dollars for a quarter ounce!
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| I like drugs but the don’t like me
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| My brain cells seem to disagree
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| I like drugs, I like drugs, I like drugs but they don’t like me
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| I was pounding some bitch the other night
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| Rolling on E man, feeling alright
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| When I was high she was hotter than heck
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| But I woke up to a face that looked like Shrek
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| I get high, that ain’t no lie
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| But I can’t afford another friggin DUI
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| Doctor says «stop, or you’ll be dying»
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| I was gonna, but then you said you were buying
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| I like drugs but the don’t like me
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| It’s always better, when they’re free!
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| I like drugs, I like drugs, I like drugs, but they don’t like me…
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| No they don’t!
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| Don’t try and stop me, I can’t be saved… oh yeah
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| If I die tonight at least my balls are shaved
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| Can you necro-feel-it!
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| Aaahhh yeah… I Like Drugs
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| I do it when I’m chillin'
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| Aaahhh yeah…
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| I like drugs
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| I’ve even snorted penicillin… Ahhh come on! |
| come on! |
| come on!
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| If I can crush it — It goes up my nose
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| If it’s smack I’ll shoot it in between my toes
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| How old am I? |
| Nobody knows!
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| My surgeon is my dealer so my age never shows!
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| Vicadin, valium, Percocet and crack
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| Everybody scream Heavy Metal’s back!
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| I like drugs but the don’t like me
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| I like drugs but the don’t like me
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| I’m driving right now to the next party
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| I like drugs, I like drugs, I like drugs, but they don’t like me!
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| Michael: Oh shit, I’m getting pulled over again…
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| Ah I better chug these beers, where’s those pills?
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| Cop: Sir do you realize you were going 25mph on the freeway back there?
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| Michael: Well what’s the fucking speed limit? |
| 15 mph?
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| Cop: Smart Ass!
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| Cop: Sir do you have any Warrants?
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| Michael: I got their first CD, but you can’t have it! |
| Later!
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| Cop: I got a 5150 on a 2112, I’m following a 1984 yellow Camaro
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| Suspect looks like a chubby David Lee Roth…
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| Scratch that, more like a skinny version of Vince Neil! |