| The canopy over the main doorway of the Ritz hotel
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| Had served as a very large umbrella when the May rains fell
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| Still the men of Paris glistened and their ladies did as well
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| As long as their powder was dry there’d be some heterosexual thrills
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| With or without the protection of the Paris Ritz hotel
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| And every single Parisian will love tonight without using hands
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| And these are the slides that Mary took when we were overseas
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| Oh, look at the funny little Frenchmen with some French company
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| There’s the Ritz hotel where me and Mary stayed a couple of days
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| Jerry, let go of your sister, what is wrong with you today
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| Sit over there with your mother and let’s sing La Marseillaise
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| The only way children are punished, unlike old times is without using hands
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| Oh, what a lovely city, city, city, city
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| Oh, what a lovely city, city, city, city
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| Oh, what a lovely city, city, city, city
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| Oh, what a lovely city, city, city, city
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| Oh, are you willing to go
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| Oh, are you willing to go
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| How about letting me know, without using hands
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| When the explosion rocked the lobby of the Ritz hotel
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| Nobody moved for fear of learning that they weren’t all that well
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| Is there is anybody missing, answer only if you’re well
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| Everyone cheered the good fortune, for indeed it turned out well
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| Only the manager suffered, but at least his face looks well
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| The manager is going to live his entire life without using hands
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| Without using hands
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| Without using hands
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| Without using hands
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| Without using hands
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| Without using hands
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| Without using hands
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| Without using hands
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| Without using hands
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| Without using hands
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| Without using hands
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| Without using hands
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| Without using hands
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| Without using hands
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| Without using hands |