| The existential threat that I always feel
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| Nothing’s happened yet today and yet I have to feel
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| Danger near, danger here
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| Nowhere to escape to and nobody there to hear
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| As I now scream in fear, scream in fear
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| The existential threat is drawing very, very near
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| And they all look away, look away
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| Can’t they see the existential threat is on its way
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| The existential threat that I tend to feel
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| When I’m walking down the street or right behind the wheel
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| Turning left, turning right
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| Trying to escape the cloud that’s close enough to feel
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| And you may laugh out loud, laugh out loud
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| The existential threat is always hanging about
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| And you may say go way, say go way
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| The existential threat is never going away
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| Doctor gave me these, I said what are these?
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| He said that they’ll cure an existential type disease
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| Doubt they will, doubt they will
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| But I’m keen to try whatever, gimme that pill
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| And he said here’s the bill, here’s the bill
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| In the end they didn’t work, I paid the whole bill
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| Because insurance won’t, they just won’t
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| Cover existential meds, I wish I had known
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| How should I react under this attack
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| Even when I’m standing up I feel I’m on my back
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| Quagmire here, quagmire there
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| I cannot elucidate the danger that is always there
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| But it is looming large, extra large
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| My semi-automatic weapon ready to discharge
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| But it’s a futile act, better pack
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| The existential threat is bulletproof and looming large
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| Sartre and Camus seemed to understand
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| Something close to what I’m feeling though they were in France
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| Deux Magots they would go
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| Each comparing existential threats they came to blows
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| And then the crowds came near just to cheer
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| For the greatest existential threatened philosophe
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| And it is comforting, comforting
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| Then the comfort starts to very quickly fade away
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| Did I wake you up, sorry if I did
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| Guess I woke you up and also woke your little kid
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| Threat outside, let me hide
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| Just until the danger passes, then I’ll go outside
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| And have to come again, once again
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| The existential threat is at your patio door
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| And do not let it in, let it in
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| When you fight the existential threat you will not win
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| The existential threat that I always feel
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| Lots of things have happened and I seek an even keel
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| Danger near, danger far
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| Nowhere to escape to and I’m racing in my car
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| As I now scream in fear, scream in fear
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| The existential threat is drawing very, very near
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| As I now drive away, by the way
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| Can’t you see the existential threat is on its way |