| Abraham Lincoln, we get it you’re tall
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| You don’t need the hat too
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| Or maybe you do
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| Mother Teresa, two words: B.O.
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| She was nice I’ll give her that
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| But she didn’t smell like a rose
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| She did a lot of good in the world
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| But guess who…
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| Smelled like poo
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| Nobody’s perfect
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| No one at all
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| Nobody’s perfect
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| There’s always a fault
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| Don’t go thinking you’re any better
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| There’s always something wrong
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| George Washington Carver
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| Changed the world with his nuts
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| He sat on a few and invented peanut butter with his butt
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| Who cares about the peanut?
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| Peanut’s like the penny of snack foods
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| And well well well, look who’s on the penny
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| I’m surprised they’re tall enough
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| (You know who)
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| Gandhi, do you ever wash
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| That white sheet that you wear?
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| Do you have a last name
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| Or is it just like Cher?
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| You hunger-striked for peace
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| When the truth was you hated your thighs
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| Enough with the lies
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| And it’s time to wash that sheet
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| Nobody’s perfect
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| No one at all
|
| Nobody’s perfect
|
| There’s always a fault
|
| Don’t go thinking you’re any better
|
| There’s always something wrong
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| Nobody’s perfect
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| I’m not perfect
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| I’m way too pretty first of all
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| I eat and eat like a pig and not gain a pound
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| The doctor’s worried about that by the way
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| My IQ is like four million
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| Which is … it can’t be a burden, actually
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| You wouldn’t understand
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| I like to think of myselfas very Jesus-y
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| I can say that because I don’t think…
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| He was the savior, anything
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| I just, I’m into peace
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| Plus I wear sandals
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| You know, he wore sandals
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| So there’s that.
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| But mostly
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| We have the same hair |