| Well when I was a kid I would take a trip
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| Every Summer down to «Mississipp,"to visit
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| My Granny and 'er «Auntie Belluam World.»
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| I’d run barefooted all-day long, climbing
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| Trees free as a song; |
| One day I happened
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| To catch myself a squirrel.
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| Well I stuffed him down
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| In an old shoe box, and punched a couple
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| Holes in the top; |
| When Sunday came I snuck em'
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| In the Church. |
| I sittin' way back on the very
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| Last pew showin em' to my good buddy Hugh,
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| When that squirrel got loose and went totally
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| Buzzerk.
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| Well what happened next is hard to tell;
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| Some thought it was Heaven others thought
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| It was Hell, but the fact that something was
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| Among was plain to see.
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| As the choir sang «I Surrender All», the
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| Squirrel ran up Harv Newman’s coveralls, and
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| Harv leaped to his feet and said something’s got
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| A hold on me yeeeooow!
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| CHORUS
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| The day the squirrel went buzzerk in the
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| First Self-Righteous Church in that sleepy little
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| Town of Pascagoula. |
| It was a fight for survival
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| That broke out in revival. |
| They were jumpin' pews
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| And shoutin' «Hallelujah».
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| VERSE 2
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| Well Harv hit the aisles dancin' and screamin'.
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| Some thought he had Religion others thought
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| He had a demon, and Harv thought he had a Weed-eater loose in his fruit-of-the-looms.
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| He fell to his knees to plead and beg, and the
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| Squirrel ran out of his britchy-leg; |
| unobserved
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| To the otherside of the room.
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| All the way down to the AMEN pew, where sat
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| «Sister Bertha Better-than-You», who had been
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| Watching all of the commotion with sufistic glee.
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| But shoot, you should have seen the look in her eyes
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| When that squirrel jumped her garders and crossed her
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| Thighs. |
| And she jumped to her feet and said,
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| «Lord have mercy on me!»
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| As the squirrel made laps inside her dress,
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| She began to cry and then to confess
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| To sins that would make a sailor blush with shame.
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| She told of gossip and church disention,
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| But the thing that got the most attention
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| Is when she talked about her love life
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| Then she started naming names!
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| The day the squirrel went berserk.
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| In the First Self-Righteous Church
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| Of that sleepy little town of Pascagoula.
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| It was a fight for survival,
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| That broke out in revival.
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| They were jumpin pews and shouting Halelujah!
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| Well seven deacons and the pastor got saved
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| And 25, 000 dollars got raised.
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| And 50 volunteered for missions in the Congo
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| On the spot.
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| And even without and invitaion
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| There were at least 500 rededications.
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| And we ALL got rebaptised whether we needed it or not.
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| Well you’ve heard the Bible stories I guess
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| Of how he parted the waters for Moses to pass.
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| All th miracles God has brought to this l' world.
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| But the one I’ll remember to my dyin day
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| Is how he put that church back on the narrow way
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| With a half crazed Mississippi Squirrel
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| The day the squirrel went berserk.
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| In the First Self-Righteous Church
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| Of that sleepy little town of Pascagoula.
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| It was a fight for survival,
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| That broke out in revival.
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| They were jumpin pews and shouting Halelujah! |