| Behind these doors, the things that are valued
|
| as the norm would cause the most open minds to close.
|
| The locks that hold these patrons inside
|
| would make most bank vaults jealous and look old.
|
| And once it shuts and your world goes black,
|
| even when your eyes are wide open, they’re closed.
|
| Sealed from truth and the ability
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| to find the bottom of it. |
| I’m not gonna lie and say
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| I haven’t been inside, but miraculously my soul hasn’t rotted from it.
|
| I personally am attracted to the bright colorless
|
| being that is its pull. |
| Singing songs to my
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| ears like sirens pulling wool over the parts that I need to see.
|
| I know the heat, the pain, I can feel it inside me.
|
| But its sharpness makes me numb, and my memory releases
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| the immediate danger status I tag so lovingly to the knob.
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| The door pushes open so easily, I note how well greased its hinges are.
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| The smooth sanded finish not repelling, but inviting me,
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| saying my name and appealing to my selfish inner greed as my fingers go
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| running across the plain. |
| Like a kid in a candy store or
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| a bull in a china cabinet, to be more accurate to the
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| situation’s name as I explore.
|
| I notice the deep impressions curved by a skilled craftsman,
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| pointing its bony finger in my direction. |
| But finally
|
| just as quietly as it runs vertically across my lips oh so silently,
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| it shows me how to always answer with a smile and a «Yes Sir».
|
| That’s the mesmerizing effect it has as I memorize
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| the bold faced letter «S"word.
|
| Behind these doors, the things that are valued
|
| as the norm would cause the most open minds to close.
|
| The locks that hold these patrons inside
|
| would make most bank vaults jealous and look old.
|
| And once it shuts and your world goes black,
|
| even when your eyes are wide open, they’re closed.
|
| My eyes go to tearing up, but really
|
| they’re just irritated, and not
|
| because my emotions can’t handle all the situations
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| my body puts them in.
|
| Faded memories, which just last week, I vowed to
|
| never forget haunt me. |
| Daunting and floating near my head
|
| whispering how much I’ll regret not remembering.
|
| The open doors that I’ve lead myself to believe that I open
|
| slam shut in my face and I walk away red eyed and cry hoping.
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| I know it’s the «I"that keeps me here,
|
| the lust of the eyes and the pride of looking at life through a mirror,
|
| and not acknowledging fear as a real emotion to be respected.
|
| I minimize, I ostracize, and I try and do it all for me;
|
| I point to the sky with one finger all the while consciously
|
| knowing I have three fingers pointing right back at me.
|
| Behind these doors I know I’ll get all the recognition I need
|
| to feed my chubby ego and mind,
|
| but it’s the lies I’m blind to, and I find myself always
|
| rubbing my eyes. |
| And still I focus hovering at the ominous,
|
| slender, sans serif letter «I».
|
| Behind these doors, the things that are valued
|
| as the norm would cause the most open minds to close.
|
| The locks that hold these patrons inside
|
| would make most bank vaults jealous and look old.
|
| And once it shuts and your world goes black,
|
| even when your eyes are wide open, they’re closed.
|
| Towards the end, I can see it now
|
| and I smile sheepishly but knowing I’m exhausted.
|
| I sit near the entrance warning the weak and curious,
|
| displaying my scars and downplaying my accomplishments.
|
| This type of canter no longer hurts my feelings
|
| for I’ve been behind all the doors I care to open.
|
| I’ve been promised it all and given gold plated sand.
|
| I sit with knives in my back looking at the smiles of those
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| who hold them.
|
| Sometimes I beat myself’s brain for ever
|
| listening to what’s behind the door.
|
| I was so interested, couldn’t be stopped
|
| and it just wouldn’t be ignored, but now I pay expenses
|
| my poor frame can never afford, in this lifetime or another.
|
| I guess the joke and the blame’s on me as I scowl
|
| wishing I had real friends.
|
| It’s my own fault though.
|
| I saw the «S"worshipped the «I"and now it’s time for my «eNd».
|
| Behind these doors, the things that are valued
|
| as the norm would cause the most open minds to close.
|
| The locks that hold these patrons inside
|
| would make most bank vaults jealous and look old.
|
| And once it shuts and your world goes black,
|
| even when your eyes are wide open, they’re closed. |