| The Misfits are cult rock & roll
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| Worshipped by a few but ignored on the whole
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| Meet the Feebles is a film cult classic
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| It’s basically unknown but some say it’s fantastic
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| Most women that I meet seem totally unfazed
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| Til sometimes there somebody who seems totally amazed
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| I might not be in magazines as a heart throb face
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| But in a few devoted hearts I’ve found a strong fan base
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| I’m a cult boyfriend, not a mainstream show
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| I’m lonely or I’m worshiped by a lady in the know
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| When you’re a cult boyfriend, life is always intense
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| They love me or they hate me no one’s on the fence
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| Cerebus is cult comic book series
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| It’s got fans but it’s never found in movies or in theories
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| WFMU is a cult radio station
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| Always tuned to by a few devoted fans around the nation
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| For every time I couldn’t get a second date or even first
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| Why does one think I’m the best when all the rest think I’m the worst
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| All of those times no one at all wanted to know
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| If I’m really all that awesome wouldn’t more people think so
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| I guess Cult Boyfriend is the term for me
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| It’s always been quality not quantity
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| A cult boyfriend’s like a record in a bargain bin
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| No one knows what it’s worth ‘til a collector comes in
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| Hm, who are some cult literary figures I can honor
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| Maybe J. G. Ballard or Flannery O’Connor
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| Haggis and Fugu, that’s like food for cult eaters
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| Jim Jones, Charles Manson, Father Yod, they’re cult leaders
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| Anyways the point being, do I have to be magical?
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| Can’t we date a few months and then move on normal and casual
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| Suicidally alone and then totally smothered
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| It’s so much pressure when you go from one extreme to the other
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| I guess Cult Boyfriend is the term for me
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| It’s always been quality not quantity
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| A cult boyfriend’s like a record in a bargain bin
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| No one knows what it’s worth ‘til a collector comes in
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| I’m a cult boyfriend, not a mainstream show
 | 
| I’m lonely or I’m worshiped by a lady in the know
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| When you’re a cult boyfriend, life is always intense
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| They’re in love or they’re indifferent, no one’s on the fence
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| And this song ain’t probably gonna go far past an open mic
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| It’s guaranteed though two or three people are really gonna like it |