| You’ve heard about my capers when windows I’ve to clean.
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| Now I’d like to tell you of a few more things I’ve seen
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| I’ve seen Miss Thompson in her flat take off her shoes her coat and hat
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| I’ve seen her take off more than that, when I’m cleaning windows.
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| At a ladies school I call, one girl flirts with me and all
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| I’m insured in case I fall, when I’m cleaning windows.
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| All day up this ladder I’m as busy as can be
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| It’s not my fault I see a lot of things I shouldn’t see
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| To overcrowded flats I’ve been, sixteen in one bed I’ve seen
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| With a lodger tucked up in between, when I’m cleaning windows
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| Old soldiers never die they say, now I don’t want to pass away
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| I kick the bucket every day when I’m cleaning windows
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| Through working at such dizzy heights, I dream about my job at night
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| I polish my wife’s thin gummy tights, and think I’m cleaning windows.
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| All day up this ladder I’m as busy as can be
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| It’s not my fault I see a lot of things I shouldn’t see
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| The newlyweds at number six, somehow the curtains they can’t fix
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| They play some lovely parlour tricks,
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| When I' m cleaning windows
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| Now lots of girls I’ve had to jilt, for they admire the way I’m built
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| It’s a good job I don’t wear a kilt, when I’m cleaning windows.
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| At the coronation I’ll commence to work where crowds are very dense
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| And let me stand for eighteen pence, instead of cleaning windows..
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| All day up this ladder I’m as busy as can be
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| It’s not my fault I see a lot of things I shouldn’t see
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| At eight o’clock a girl she wakes, at five past eight a bath she takes.
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| At ten past eight my ladder breaks, when I’m cleaning windows. |