| We’ve mined calculated sleaze
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| For countless fortnights, for this forthright
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| Canny canning
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| So we plead for what you can’t believe
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| And career suicide, poolside
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| By the candied landing
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| I withstood an unwound mortal coil
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| At the hands of deputized beauticians
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| This hundred pound torso broils
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| In the Gap ads and plastic slag of New Britain
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| Unmanned imaginarium, I implore you
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| On your gut-caked eve
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| Pull me from Los Angeles' large intestines
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| And the teeth of Charlton Heston’s fleas
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| The nail-biter stratagem hallmark
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| Constitute the rock layers of this product push
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| That ethical value base doesn’t change how you taste
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| Or the law’s arch
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| As known by this war headed octopus
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| Your rogue circles are nudged and summed
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| As mere collagist’s twig kraut
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| So sell those selves with infomercial aplomb
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| And a face-fitting pig snout, figure it out
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| Canucks! |
| Canuck!
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| Open your arms, ask yourself
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| «Am I dangerous or endangered?»
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| I may imagine my way to
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| Quebec and back, Quebec and back
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| And I may dream my way to
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| Quebec and back, Quebec and back
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| But I’ll probably die on the way to…
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| The jackknifing rancor of your thousand eyed face
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| Lends itself to militarized hobnobbing with Don Johnson
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| I leave cracked icing on course to some galvanized base
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| And I barren showy spouse for snowy alps
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| Cradling political asylum
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| Green room signee! |
| In piss-colored gold
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| Spooning chef salads onto cartoonists' cleft palettes
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| You’ll be detuned and dyed peach to hit the mother load
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| But this is what you’ll die from
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| «Go into the Canadian consulate like…» |