| Holland is ruled by midgets
|
| The Pope owns CBS
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| The subway cars have been equipped with bars
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| And they’re cloning Rudolph Hess
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| Samantha Fox has gone frigid
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| The President’s painted green
|
| Jesus Christ has been frozen in ice
|
| But he still makes the scene
|
| Everybody wants to know what gives
|
| But I know where the Tarantula lives
|
| Jim Bakker got eaten by wombats
|
| The Fever’s spread to town
|
| Ol' Doris Day has been taken away
|
| Has anybody seen my downs?
|
| Popeye got killed in combat
|
| Donny and Marie went punk
|
| B.F. Skinner has eaten my dinner
|
| There’s a body in that trunk
|
| Everybody wants to know what gives
|
| But I know where the Tarantula lives
|
| Uncle Bob caught fire
|
| The protesters are on strike
|
| Mr. Green Jeans is acting obscene
|
| 'Cause his Jello has been spiked
|
| Honesty is a liar
|
| The truth is in the sink
|
| Auntie Bess says «I must confess
|
| Now what do you all think?»
|
| Everybody wants to know what gives
|
| But I know where the Tarantula lives
|
| (I know where)
|
| Everybody wants to know what gives
|
| But I know where the Tarantula lives |