Song information On this page you can read the lyrics of the song Here , by - Suffocate for Fuck Sake. Release date: 15.04.2021
Song language: English
Here |
| She could drive us completely crazy. |
| She could sit at the dining table and I |
| was maybe 15−16 so I knew how it worked, and then we had ordered pizza and food. |
| Fat pizza, well that ain‘t good for me since I‘m so fat. |
| I was a 160 cm tall |
| and weighed 48 kilos so I wasn‘t fat at all. |
| But then she could start throw |
| comments and start provoking me. |
| She could go on for hours saying, |
| How disgusting you are when you eat that. |
| Your parents must turn in the grave |
| when they see you eating that pizzaI tried to say sometimes «please, |
| can’t we just sit here and eat? |
| I cannot tak it anymore. |
| Please stop» |
| But sh went on and on and finally I snapped, my eyes turned black |
| So I attacked her and sat over her… and I hit her as hard as I could over the |
| face. |
| I remembered how damn good it felt |
| Placed on foreign soil |
| Your judging eyes connected to mine |
| You feed me lies |
| And starved me out |
| Left broken |
| With dreams of what I couldn‘t have |
| And so I hurt you |
| The only way I could |
| Left with hate |
| As eating became the escape |
| Left with hate |
| As eating became my escape |
| This particular period is dizzy, I feel dizzy when I talk about it. |
| No time concepts, I just think of all these words she called me and this |
| fucking anxiety I have felt basically every day since I was nine years old. |
| From having moved away from home… lost my parents, Ended up there, |
| she starts drinking, stressing me about food and calling us ugly names, |
| getting completely destroyed. |
| So I was just trying to survive |
| If I wanna go, jump in the water |
| Does it even matter |
| What does it even matter if I can’t say it |
| I would always be there |
| Everything with the food craziness that I had at home made me start dreaming |
| about food. |
| I thought to myself that when I move away from home, |
| I will eat everything I want. |
| I started fantasizing about cakes and similar |
| things and thought «when I grow up I will eat»… I remember that I started |
| fantasizing about food very early. |
| I finally weighed 120 kilos, huge… I liked |
| just being at home when I had moved away from home to my own apartment. |
| Because there I could shut myself in for days and just eat, but I did not |
| understand it then… I did not realize that I weighed so much. |
| When I look at |
| pictures now, I think «oh my god» |