| Hold your breath when you see me walking by
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| I’m obsessed with movies, like Barbed Wire throw a stiletto in ya eye
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| I confess I’m like Jesse James in an Ames parking lot
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| Have humorous fun pullin numerous guns on consumers (Run!)
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| Your man-freaked that, I told John- Get Back
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| Broke your 8Track A-Dats stole your Kit Kats
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| Grab your fanny pack and gagged you with a six pack a six White Castle sack
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| Drip wax in your office fax changed a few facts in your contract
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| Your advance is axed and A & R is gonna write all ya new tracks
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| I’m on the dole with mad loot sellin bootlegs of poor artists
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| Got two legs to work but I beg for change to drink Bacardis
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| Hearty meals got these Hardy Boys hard then taught Nancy Drew and her dog
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| How to jerk off and how to steal from drug dealers
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| Ahh enough of this I killed Snuffalufagus
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| With pills and made a snuff film
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| To prove to Big Bird he exists (See he is real!)
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| I’m ill can’t deal with mere mortals
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| Got a portal in my knee to beam me
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| To a balance beam but I just drank 3 Jim Beams
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| My Olympic team is gonna scream at me, is it my turn? |
| I gotta pee
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| I’m 14 but haven’t grown since I was three
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| Get my kicks feedin drinks to kids in rehab clinks
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| Minx took Pink to my sink and used her hair die to die my minks
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| Tattoo inks with Ajax I highjacked Pat Sajak
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| Sent him back to Wheel of Fortune with a bad limp and a crack habit
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| Silly rabbit this song is for kids, the way the messed up system is
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| If I was a black man I’d be up on a 8 year bid
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| Id ego you know I wish I owned those
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| But I sold em to buy nice speakers
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| (What kind?) Bose
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| Trouble-We like it like that
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| Trouble capital T stands for me
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| Punchin ya tummy cover you with honey and ants
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| Fatal Attraction boil a bunny while I breakdance
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| Fart in my hotpants in a crowded theatre at Sundance
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| (must have been the hot ranch)
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| So let’s dance because I killed Bowie’s wife with a bowie knife
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| C’mon mon it was Iman and man Bowie’s my man gimme one more night
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| I just upchucked my pills and Tom Collins
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| On Phil Collins, I mean Phil it was just a spill-chill
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| Bad upbringing I made Jerry’s kids phone stop ringing
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| I’m only kiddin with this sick singing
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| I’m just givin what this track’s bringin
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| Trouble I’m not subtle I need more air
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| So I popped that kid and stole his bubble
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| Stuck him in some double Tupperware
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| A clean death inject ya with Crest and crystal meth
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| Obsessed with my own breasts
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| Won’t look at you so don’t get undressed for sex
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| I guess I’m on a rampage for underage idols
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| Did Malcolm’s bro in the middle and little Kenny with subtitles
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| I strike quick like the emperor not the right temperature and
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| I think it’s too easy to make fun of 98 Degrees
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| And now that you mention it Britney, Christina, and N’sync
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| Why even bother, we’ll all be gone by next week |