Song information On this page you can find the lyrics of the song Samurai Abstinence Patrol, artist - Ninja Sex Party.
Date of issue: 16.07.2015
Age restrictions: 18+
Song language: English
Samurai Abstinence Patrol |
In the tall skyscrapers of ancient Japan |
Lived two great warriors, a dude and a man |
Who proclaimed no sex until you are married |
They were Arin Neverbone and Samurai Barry |
500 years later, two heroes were born |
One clothed in blue spandex, the other in scorn |
They were Ninja Sex Party, they had but one quest: |
To bring sex to the masses, 'cuz that shit is the best |
In a super-hot orgy with ten girls and a mime |
Danny thrusted so hard he ripped a hole in space-time |
Each hump could be seen in the ancient night sky |
Graphic shots of Dan’s nuts were in healthy supply |
Arin and Barry knew they had to act fast |
They jumped through to the future 'cuz they were dicks from the past |
They landed two feet from where NSP was rocking |
And screamed «Danny, it’s your cock that we now will be blocking!» |
Samurai Abstinence Patrol |
To control all our junk is their one true goal |
It’s a battle for boners and rock and roll |
Ninja Brian will stab them in the soul (And the face!) |
What could this mean for Ninja Sex Party? |
Will our heroes be stopped from their boning spree? |
And will Danny get first place in his spelling bee? |
The championship word is «nomenclature!» |
Uh… N… O… C |
(buzzer noise) FUCK IT! |
The orgy ground to a halt and they took it outside |
The girls just went home, the mime probably died |
Brian ran at Arin while Barry started screaming |
Could we really have a future in a world without creaming? |
All hell broke loose with the insane war cry |
Arin soared through the air. |
Apparently, he can fly |
Danny french-kissed a girl like he was king of Versailles |
Brian stabbed some random guy with a different guy |
The battle raged on 'til the city was wrecked |
But the two sides began to have mutual respect |
«God damn,» Arin yelled. |
«You must sure love to slam» |
«You don’t even know,» said Danny. |
«That shit is my jam» |
A union was formed between both rival camps |
And they both started rocking using NSP’s amps |
But the cease-fire ended and the battle resumed |
'Cuz Danny whipped out his nuts and the alliance was doomed |
Samurai Abstinence Patrol |
Now their tale will be passed down in sacred scrolls |
They were voted «Most Douchey» in a recent poll |
Independently-conducted by Danny and Brian |
Is the story over or has it just begun? |
Has the battle for boning been lost or won? |
The question is a deep and important one |
Just like how in God’s name do you spell «nomenclature?!» |
Here we go… |
N… R |
(buzzer noise) This is literally fucking impossible! |