| What are facts, Jack? |
| A game we have to play
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| Stumbling blocks, Jack, scattered in our way
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| By our foes, Jack, cowardly enemies
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| With whom facts, Jack, apparently agree
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| What are facts, Jack? |
| It’s always puzzled me
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| When I take power, Jack, there’ll be some changes, see
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| When I’ve bagged, Jack, the presidency
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| Facts will knock, Jack, before they visit me
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| What are facts, Jack? |
| I tell you day is night
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| Â If you like, Jack, you can say I’m right
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| All that counts is to agree with what I say
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| Facts are crap, Jack, they get in the way
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| What are facts, Jack? |
| What are they anyway?
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| Everything’s interpretation anyway
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| Climate change, Jack, a point of view to spin
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| If you like, Jack, it isn’t happening
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| Fact-check Jack, you haven’t got a clue
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| You check facts, have you nothing real to do?
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| Check this out, Jack, power is all that counts
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| Power, power and power, power, power and power
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| What are facts, Jack, strap them to the bed
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| Wave a stun prod around their pretty heads
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| Facts shrink fast before a taser or a gun
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| Facts are cowards, Jack, just like anyone
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| Fact check Jack, let me make this clear
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| Facts are dead, Jack, starting next year
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| Me and Vlad, Jack, have a little plan
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| From Jan 1, Jack, facts are banned |