Song information On this page you can find the lyrics of the song For a Limited Time Only, artist - Jam Baxter. Date of issue: 21.02.2017
Age restrictions: 18+
Song language: English
For a Limited Time Only |
| 'This man has a secret he hides from his family |
| An overwhelming desire for the crumbly crispness |
| The subtle flavour of Simmers Rice Biscuits' |
| 'Really darling, electricity costs money! |
| But what’s the use of having nice |
| skin if nobody can see it?' |
| 'His wife discovered Simmers Rice Biscuits long ago, have you?' |
| 'For the fresh clear skin you’re meant to have, trust the purest toilet soap |
| possible' |
| Yeah, urgent appeal from a drowsy drunk |
| For just three pounds a month |
| You could provide me just enough water |
| To find your saviour and drown the cunt |
| Sale starts Monday |
| Stand out from the crowd with a mound of junk |
| Our dedicated team are on hand daily to sell your baby an ounce of punk |
| Coming soon to a city near you |
| For just fourteen ninety-nine |
| This sweltering mass of electrified cables |
| Can jump start your new life of crime |
| Smother your face in our brand new fragrance |
| Bathe yourself in the fountain of payments |
| This Easter, please spare a thought for my dwindling patience |
| Brand new for your cupboards: spoilt milk tailored for poor mothers |
| Research suggests our cream can make your life 95 percent more butters |
| Have you been wasted for four summers? |
| Surviving on cider and raw uppers |
| Yeah, call our store our spiralling eyeballs come in all colours |
| Have you tried our incredible sputum |
| Shakily tested and chemically proven |
| To smoothen the wrinkling head of a human |
| Renders age a pathetic illusion |
| Gargle this light brown soup |
| Here at the Eye Gouge Group we’re committed to providing a service |
| To leave you blissfully blind |
| Lie down troops, lie down troops, lie down troops |
| Enlist now be the best |
| Start a career in dealing death |
| Become a one-legged old bleeding mess |
| If you only call one number today |
| Before your fingers crumble away |
| Before these buildings rust and decay |
| And your clutching a nostril encrusted in K |
| Please make it ours |
| Two for one deals on brains in jars |
| Count your coins, we proudly present our |
| Brand new extensive range of parts |
| Wake up, roll up, feast your eyes |
| Join up now for a free surprise |
| This flick knife comes with a whole bag of drama |
| A getaway car and a free disguise |
| Our brand new formula greases the palms |
| Of your well dressed torturer |
| Comes recommended by your top sadist |
| Gassed at the thought of your unspoilt faces |
| Sign up here |
| Free ten pound bet |
| Drain your accounts and consolidate all your remaining debt |
| 'If we call just show us a large Daz packet, answer a simple question correctly |
| And you win five pounds! |
| If you have two large or one giant-size, |
| you can win ten pounds!' |
| 'Is your date afraid of lights? |
| No I am, with this ghastly skin, I’m always washing like you told me |
| But even my super new perfume soap hasn’t helped' |
| 'Scotch Perkins, by Simmers. |
| Full of goodness, full of ginger and spice and all |
| things nice' |
| Shit, how long had I been watching these? |
| How long had I been staring at billboards |
| Feeding my coins into slot machines |
| I never clocked it was possible to puke for 20 months straight |
| You should’ve told me, I stubbed out my rolly |
| Something in the air made the room seem mouldy |
| Stare out coldly |
| Belled my bredrin, paid him a visit |
| The rain seems strangely acidic |
| I’m not sure why the burning sensation was vaguely idyllic |
| By the time I sank my last bevvy |
| My jingling wallet felt so darn heavy |
| By the time I reached the end of my street |
| I’d somehow squandered every last penny |
| Every last penny, every last penny, every last penny |
| Dog food, dish cloth, mouthwash, Henny |
| Every trace of the Queen’s face ripped into one cascade of confetti |
| I got yard sat down sank deep in my seat and switched on the telly |
| 'And here’s another exciting thing to look out for! |
| Our squires are already putting this leaflet through almost every door! |
| It gives you an extra chance of winning the same big prizes' |
| 'Get Fairy Snow for extra white clothes. |
| Fairy Snow forces grey out — forces |
| white in' |
| 'Don't miss this great chance to win big prizes, and remember: Daz washes so |
| white you can see the difference' |
| 'Extra creamy and to pamper the palate pour Carnation over the pudding too' |
| 'It's delicious' |
| 'It's delicious' |
| 'It's delicious'… |