| You’re talking out your arse, I’m talking out my mouth | 
| You’re squarking out your bars while I’m walking out the house | 
| And I don’t make the rules, I just play the game | 
| And I won’t bring my balls for no shameless bit of fame | 
| You’re sniffing up your ket, I’m sniffing up my coke | 
| But I ain’t gonna magnify the difference in a bloke | 
| You’re living off the dole, I’m living off my soul | 
| And I don’t wanna bitch about the system when I’m old | 
| I’m gonna buy some land, you’re gonna buy some drugs | 
| You’re gonna find a slag while I’m gonna find some love | 
| You’re smoking on a dick, I’m smoking on a spliff | 
| You’re showing off your kids and I’m a chauvinistic pig | 
| You’re ringing up your mum, I’m drinking with your dad | 
| He’s pissing in the street while he’s fingering a slag | 
| You’re living in a dream, I dribble in my sleep | 
| You’re looking in the mirror while I’m spitting to this beat | 
| You’re going to the fair, I’m going to the shops | 
| You ain’t gonna hear my fucking album 'til it drops | 
| You’re pissing in a bog, I’m pissing in a bush | 
| You listen to the trickle, it’s a mission to the woods | 
| You’re combing your hair, but nobody cares | 
| I’m a scruffy fucker but my omen is rare | 
| You’re over-prepared, I’m casually lax | 
| I’m sat in the back of a taxi relaxed | 
| And I don’t wanna prang, I just wanna chill | 
| When you just wanna hang around with slappers eating pills | 
| I just wanna fuck, you just wanna wank | 
| Ladies and gents give a very big thanks and a round of applause | 
| Man, you’re a nause | 
| I don’t wanna hang around with mans any more | 
| You’re trying to be my friend, I’m trying to be a dick | 
| You’re trying to make it stick while I’m trying to get rid | 
| (Verse 2 — Jam Baxter) | 
| I’m straddling a pig, you’re a maggot in a wig | 
| You’ve gone and bought your whole smackwagon to the gig, why’s it matter who | 
| I’m with? | 
| You’re chatting to a twig | 
| You try and spit a verse and end up fracturing your ribs | 
| And I don’t wanna judge, you’re on a lot of drugs | 
| And yeah I know there’s one thousand ways to hold a grudge | 
| But me I’m trying to speak, you’re just trying to preach | 
| My ears about to stab itself and drink a pint of bleach | 
| You’re talking to a child, I’m talking to a dwarf | 
| With 5 drops of acid in a nice warm sauce | 
| But you’re doing what you can, I’m doing what you can’t | 
| You’re stuck being who you are, my whole crew’s who you aren’t | 
| Backflipping to the past I’d return with a gun | 
| You’d return with a badly drawn picture of your mum | 
| You’re staring at my crotch, I’m try’na have a cotch | 
| Spent the last 5 hours staring at my watch | 
| Man I just wanna leave, you just wanna grieve | 
| I’m long past hearing about the shit that you believe | 
| See I turn up to The Shoobs, you turn up in a bush | 
| Last seen suckling the virgin in the woods | 
| Man I just wanna lounge, you just wanna scrounge | 
| I got a pair of creepy little eyes I can gouge | 
| And I’ll hand 'em to you, have a chat with your crew | 
| I bowl around free, you’re entangled in glue | 
| Gluey hands of a nonce, you’re banned from the swamps | 
| I’m try’na cook an egg, you’re a cancerous ponce | 
| I’m living on the edge, you’re living in a hedge | 
| I’m try’na make an album, you’re try’na make a wedge | 
| I’m calling you a chief, you’re calling the police | 
| I’m trawling in the street and you’re absorbed in the mystique | 
| Man I’m working for myself, you work for someone else | 
| You watch the world turn while I watch the world melt | 
| Shut up! |