| Just 'cause I ain’t never had, no, nothing worth having, never ever, never ever
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| You ain’t got no call, not to think of what I’m falling to, thinking that I
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| ain’t too clever
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| And it ain’t not having one thing nor not another either, neither is it
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| anything whatever
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| And it’s not not knowing that there ain’t nothing showing and I answer to the
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| name of Trevor, however
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| Just 'cause I ain’t never said, no, nothing worth saying, never ever, never,
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| never ever
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| Things have got read into what I never said till me mouth becomes me head which
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| ain’t not all that clever
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| And it’s not not saying one thing nor not another either, neither is it
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| anything I haven’t said whatever
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| And it ain’t not proving that my mind ain’t moving and I answer to the name of
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| Trevor, however
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| Knock me down with a feather, clever Trevor
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| Widebrows wonder whether clever Trevor’s clever
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| Either have they got, nor neither haven’t not
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| Got no right to make a clot out of Trevor
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| Why should I feel bad about something I ain’t had
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| Such stupidness is mad 'cause nothing underfoot
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| Comes to nothing less to add to a load of old toot
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| And I ain’t half not half glad 'cause there’s nowhere to put
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| It even if I had, I’m a bit of a Jack the Lad
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| Knock me down with a feather, clever Trevor
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| Widebrows wonder whether clever Trevor’s clever
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| Either have they got, nor neither haven’t not
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| Got no right to make a clot out of Trevor
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| Also, it takes much longer to get up North the slow way |