| Oh, listen up
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| Young man, there’s a—there's a young man, he writes stories
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| He’s a writer, a little writer boy
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| He falls in love with a girl, girl already has a boyfriend
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| She kinda loves him back, but not really
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| They’re just really good friends, and that’s fine
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| He understands, it’s rational
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| Hi, what’s your name? |
| How are you? |
| How’s your life?
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| Oh, you got a man? |
| Are you in love? |
| If so, what type?
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| Is it just platonic, strictly just as friends
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| Or the type that ties you two together 'til tomorrow’s end?
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| If it is, disregard every time I call you pretty
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| Though it’s meant sincerely, it’s just my imagination drifting
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| Brush me off like the dirt on Jay-Z's shoulders
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| So I fall to ground, collect myself and get ready to take over your heart
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| Or at least your spare time
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| And I love the thought of being with you
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| Or maybe it’s the thought of not being so alone!
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| Hey, the second one’s way sadder than the first one
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| But I don’t know
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| I love the thought of being with you
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| Or maybe it’s the thought of not being so alone!
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| The second one’s way sadder than the first one
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| But I don’t know
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| We should go and get a friggin' cup of coffee
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| And I’ll act friendly and I won’t pull any stunts
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| But I’m a little stunt puller from birth
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| So I don’t know what to tell you
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| If I try to confess my love for… scones
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| I just wanna say something real quick, please shh, listen
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| I love… these scones
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| Just the diversity between the selection they have here
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| The blueberry, the raspberry, strawberry, pumpkin
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| Even which is basically a friggin' squash
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| How they gonna make a scone out of a freaking squash?
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| Oh, wow, wow
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| That shit blows my mind
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| That’s Elon Musk just in his little lab cooking up, baby
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| But what were you talking about?
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| Oh yeah, your boyfriend made you mad the other day?
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| What was he saying? |
| Oh, what do I think? |
| Hm…
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| He was being mean at that part—point?
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| But I’m sure he’s gonna turn around at some… point, as well
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| And
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| I love the thought of being with you
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| Or maybe it’s the thought of not being so alone!
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| The second one’s way sadder than the first one
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| But I don’t know
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| I love the thought of being with you, whoa, whoa, whoa
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| Or maybe it’s the thought of not being so alone!
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| Shit, I love being—I love being loved, but
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| Don’t like crying on the phone
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| Hi, wassup?
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| Yeah, what’s going on?
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| Oh yeah, she told me a lot about you, yeah, uh-huh
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| It’s so great you’re doing all of those things
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| You should keep doing all of them I think
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| Oh yeah, my name’s Hobo Johnson
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| People like to say I’m a rapper, I’m actually not
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| I produced this myself, I’m hella fucking proud of it
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| But yeah, she like—she's so nice
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| She was so nice and cared about me, no one else did
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| Literally, I don’t think I’ve ever felt love before that
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| She’s a peach… scone
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| She’s a peach scone, yes
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| And
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| I love the thought of being with her
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| I just really hope that she doesn’t get hurt, y’know?
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| They say it takes two years to come back down to Earth
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| From that lovely place that you’ve been, I heard it’s so nice
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| Good for you guys, I’m—I'm glad (Being so alone!)
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| And if you find someone who loves you for who you are
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| Keep loving 'em, man
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| 'Cause that shit happens like, once in a lifetime, y’know?
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| And who am I to get in the way of someone living their lifetime Y’know?
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| And I hope you’re doing really well, I haven’t talked to you in a while
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| But uh, I found someone else who really loves me for who I am
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| But I don’t call them enough, and that’s why they moved away
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| I’m gonna call them right now, she wants me to call her
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| Okay, bye |