| Well here we are and here we go
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| Up the hill and down the slope
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| Pardon me if I seem out of breath
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| Bus was late so I walked instead
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| There’s nobody quite like me
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| Isn’t that Presumably
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| What it is they say you’re looking for
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| Ballad singer with a guitar
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| Okay so guitar was the part I got wrong
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| The rest of me surely is what you want
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| Wait a minute who is this
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| He needs a psychiatrist
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| Either that or I do give me strength
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| (Would do If I knew the way it went)
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| You say you sing slow songs and fast numbers too
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| Do you know Volare
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| (Is that her next to you)
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| I’m running round in circles
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| I’m getting so forlorn
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| Whatever so forlorn’s supposed to mean
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| I’m sick of good intentions
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| Whatever their intent on being
|
| Who’s responsibility lies in sending him to me
|
| Tell me and I’ll tear them limb from limb
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| I said Matt Monro not Gunga Din
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| Our members will see him and eat him alive
|
| No two ways about it
|
| Or three or four or five
|
| One day you’ll see I’ll he enormous
|
| (Then here’s a tip lay off your fookin)
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| They’ll say of me and my performance
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| It’s was superb (don't make me laugh)
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| The best we’ve heard (you must he daft)
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| False modesty is not for me
|
| The way to skin a rabbit the way to comb a hare
|
| I know which one of those I’d rather heed
|
| As I’m sure would the rabbit
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| Who only wants to live and breed I write each and all my songs
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| Always have done all along
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| So if you want «My Way» I can do
|
| Every song in my way just for you
|
| Has it occurred to you that I might not be well
|
| I’ve got a heart that needs a bypass I can tell
|
| So here we are together then
|
| You and me the best of friends
|
| (Best of friends you must be off your head)
|
| How about employer then instead
|
| We have to work closely and mostly we do
|
| We’re at opposite ends of
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| An industry without any smoke
|
| It’s boiler being only fired by hope
|
| It is Showbiz |