Song information On this page you can find the lyrics of the song Asshole, artist - Denis Leary. Album song No Cure For Cancer, in the genre Поп
Date of issue: 31.12.1992
Record label: A&M
Song language: English
Asshole |
Folks, I’d like to sing a song about the American Dream |
About me, about you |
About the way our American hearts beat way down in the bottom of our chests |
About that special feeling we get in the cockles of our hearts |
Maybe below the cockles |
Maybe in the sub cockle area |
Maybe in the liver, maybe in the kidneys |
Maybe even in the colon, we don’t know |
I’m just a regular Joe, with a regular job |
I’m your average white, suburbanite slob |
I like football and porno and books about war |
I got an average house, with a nice hardwood floor |
My wife and my job, my kids and my car |
My feet on my table, and a Cuban cigar |
But sometimes that just ain’t enough to keep a man like me interested |
(Oh no, no way, uh uh) |
No I gotta go out and have fun at someone else’s expense |
(Whoa, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) |
I drive really slow in the ultra fast lane |
While people behind me are going insane |
I’m an asshole (he's an asshole, what an asshole) |
I’m an asshole (he's an asshole, such an asshole) |
I use public toilets and I piss on the seat |
I walk around in the summer time saying «how about this heat?» |
I’m an asshole (he's an asshole, what an asshole) |
I’m an asshole (he's the world’s biggest asshole) |
Sometimes I park in handicapped spaces |
While handicapped people make handicapped faces |
I’m an asshole (he's an asshole, what an asshole) |
I’m an asshole (he's a real fucking asshole) |
Maybe I shouldn’t be singing this song |
Ranting and raving and carrying on |
Maybe they’re right when they tell me I’m wrong… |
Nah |
I’m an asshole (he's an asshole, what an asshole) |
I’m an asshole (he's the world’s biggest asshole) |
You know what I’m gonna do? |
I’m gonna get myself a 1967 Cadillac Eldorado convertible |
Hot pink, with whale skin hubcaps |
And all leather cow interior |
And big brown baby seal eyes for head lights (yeah) |
And I’m gonna drive in that baby at 115 miles per hour |
Gettin' 1 mile per gallon |
Sucking down Quarter Pounder cheeseburgers from McDonald’s |
In the old fashioned non-biodegradable styrofoam containers |
And when I’m done sucking down those greaseball burgers |
I’m gonna wipe my mouth with the American flag |
And then I’m gonna toss the styrofoam containers right out the side |
And there ain’t a goddamn thing anybody can do about it |
You know why, because we’ve got the bomb, that’s why |
Two words, nuclear fucking weapons, OK? |
Russia, Germany, Romania, they can have all the democracy they want |
They can have a big democracy cakewalk |
Right through the middle of Tiananmen Square |
And it won’t make a lick of difference |
Because we’ve got the bombs, OK? |
John Wayne’s not dead, he’s frozen |
And as soon as we find a cure for cancer |
We’re gonna thaw out the Duke and he’s gonna be pretty pissed off |
You know why |
Have you ever taken a cold shower? |
Well multiply that by 15 million times |
That’s how pissed off the Duke’s gonna be! |
I’m gonna get the Duke, and John Cassavetes |
And Lee Marvin, and Sam Peckinpah, and a case of whiskey |
And drive down to Texas and |
(Hey! You know, you really are an asshole!) |
Why don’t you just shut up and sing the song, pal? |
I’m an asshole (he's an asshole, what an asshole) |
I’m an asshole (he's the world’s biggest asshole) |
Everybody |
I’m an asshole and I’m proud of it |