| If I was with a woman, she’d wonder what was happening
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| Little things would slowly go askew
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| If I was with a woman, I’d make her quite unhappy
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| Specially when she did not want me to If I was with a woman, I’d make believe I loved her
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| All the time I would not like her much
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| If I was with a woman, she’d soon become unsettled
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| I’d show her but I would not let her touch
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| Look at them laughing
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| Look at them laughing
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| Look at them laughing
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| Laughing, laughing
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| If I was with a woman, I’d never ask her questions
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| But if she did not want me to I would
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| If I was with a woman, I’d offer my indifference
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| And make quite sure she never understood
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| Oh, if I was with a woman, I’d threaten to unload her
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| Every time she asks me to explain
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| Oh, if I was with a woman, she’d have to learn to cherish
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| The purity and depth of my disdain
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| Look at them laughing
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| Look at them laughing
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| Look at them laughing
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| Laughing, laughing
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| I’ve been with a woman, she took away my spirit
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| No woman’s coming close to me again
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| Oh, I’ve been with a woman, she took away my spirit
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| No woman’s coming close to me again
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| Look at them laughing
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| Look at them laughing
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| Look at them laughing
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| Laughing, laughing |