Lyrics Chicks Dig Jerks - Bill Hicks

Chicks Dig Jerks

Oh, man
Oh, Hitler had Eva Braun
Manson had Squeaky Fromme
Ted Bundy got lots of dates
I wonder what I'm doing wrong
I don't pretend to understand women's little quirks
Just one thing I know for sure, chicks dig jerks, yeah
Well, if I meet one more single mom
Whose true love is up and gone
Tells me on her trailer porch
'Bout that man, still carries a torch
Sure, he came home drunk each night
Beat the kids and her in a fight
But man, she loves him so!
It's so hard to let him go, oww
Well, I don't pretend to understand women's little quirks
Just one thing I know for sure, chicks dig jerks
Well, I'm sure there's some out there can relate
Take the young man without a date
See some jerk, some fine fine babe
Drivin' away, oww
Well, is that a new bruise you got on you?
What does it say, that he loves you?
Sure, he beats you, but afterwards he cries
Oh baby, I could die
Honey, I don't think that's nothin' to be proud of
I think it's called alcoholism
I don't think you should move away
Stay with him 'til you're in your grave, yeah
"You're so sweet."
"Can't we just be friends?"
"I think of you as a brother."
"Awwww, man."
Ow.
Ow.
You're hurtin' me
Ow.
Ow
What do I have to offer you, baby?
Poetry and true love
That's not enough, I know for sure
You need someone to throw you through the door
Well, I don't pretend to understand women's little quirks
Just one thing I know for sure, chicks dig jerks, oww
Yeah
Chicks dig jerks, so true
Tell you man, be mean to 'em, man
They'll never leave you then
'Cause chicks dig jerks
Just ignore 'em, act like they're not there
Man, you're gonna be pullin' chicks out of your hair
They love that
Whoo!
Act like you don't care
Oh, look at 'em everywhere!
They come runnin'
Whoo!
Tired of bein' a good guy
Such a lonely life
I'm gonna be a jerk!
Yeah, that's right!
I'm gonna step on lots of toes
Whoo!
Girls gonna go crazy for that guy
Baby, I'mma act like I don't even know you
Whoo!
Not gonna return one of your calls!
Ho!
I hear her, she's already at the door, man
She's intrigued by my indifference!
Whoo!
I'm a jerk!
And it's working out