| The song starts off and this boy
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| Is writing a letter to Dorothy Dix
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| He says, dear Dorothy Dix
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| I am in worst fix that
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| I have ever been in
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| Says, just what does a boy do
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| When right out of the blue
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| She invites him in and says
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| (Ooh, ooh
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| Make yourself comfortable, baby)
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| Yeah, now you can
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| Tell right there, friends
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| That he don’t know nothing
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| Because, he don’t, because
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| Let me tell you something
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| It ain’t outta no blue
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| That she invited him in there
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| No, sir, she had everything
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| Squared away before she
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| Ever got him to the door
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| (I got some records here
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| To put you in the mood)
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| Yeah, see, she’s got Hearts of Stone
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| That’s a real good courtin' record
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| And all of Roy Acuff’s songs
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| (The phone is off the hook
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| So no one can intrude)
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| See, the reason she took the
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| Phone off the hook is so
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| He couldn’t get no outside help
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| (I feel romantic and the
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| Record changer’s automatic, baby)
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| Yeah, I think, friends
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| That by this time, it’s pretty clear
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| With her feeling romantic and
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| Automatic record changers and everything
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| That she ain’t got that boy in there |
| To eat no cake and ice cream
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| All right, you all go ahead
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| (Sweetheart, we’ve hurried
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| Through the dinner
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| Hurried through the dance
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| Left before the picture show
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| Was through)
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| See, he spent all kinds
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| Of money on her that night
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| He did, there ain’t telling how much
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| He dropped at the Bluebird Cafe
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| Right by itself
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| And after going through
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| All of the trouble to take her
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| To the moving pictures
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| She yanked him out of there before
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| Tex Ritter shot the first Indian
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| And why did she do all this
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| (To leave some time for this
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| To hug a hug and kiss a kiss now)
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| Look out now, look out
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| See, she said right there
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| That she wants him to kiss her
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| And she does, friends, she does
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| What I mean to tell you
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| She wants him to flat
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| Plant one on her
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| (Take off your shoesies, dear
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| And loosen up your tie)
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| Do you notice that she never
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| Does call him by his right name
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| She don’t know it, she don’t
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| They ain’t even shook hands yet
|
| (I've got some kisses here
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| Let’s try one on for size
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| I’ll turn the lights low while)
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| Yeah, hold, hold
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| Hold it right there, everybody |
| Hold it right there
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| Now right chere’s his chance
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| He can either, while
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| She’s up cutting that light down
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| He can tip on out or he can
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| Do the real all American
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| Semper Paratis type of thing
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| And I’d do it if I was him
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| I’d put me a whole nother batch
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| Of records on that machine
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| I’d cut that light down one more notch
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| I’d kick off my two-toned perforated shoes
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| I’d get me an armful of that sweet thing
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| And we’d both
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| (Make ourselves comfortable, baby) |