| Over to Bob for the weather and funnies
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| A murdering mob and some ugly bugs bunny
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| With a Valentines card from a ghost town that’s haunted
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| By the National Guard and America’s least wanted
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| Ciming up next we’ve got more global warming
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| And the greenhouse affect on the Beatles reforming
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| A miracle diet of water a lettuce
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| Los Angeles riots, more after this message
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| In the next half an hour the jury with their verdict
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| Two bags of flour, a pig and a turnip
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| In the day of the jackarse in the year of the bing bong
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| They adjourned to the crackhouse for a beer and a sing song
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| If only you’ll stay to the end of this story
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| I’ll tell your mum and dad not to worry
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| I’ll love you forever when the TV is gone
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| And I’ll love you now when it’s on
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| The potatoes and meat from the heart of America
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| To the eyes and the teeth and the arsehole of everywhere
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| For the great of the good and the love of the nation
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| To the boys in the hoods with the crucifixation
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| Cabled and networked to the land of the plenty
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| Where the tables are set but the cupboards are empty
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| It’s sexy, it’s groovy, it’s big and it’s clever
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| Turn on, tune in and switch off forever |