Lyrics The Worst Sideshow Ever - The Men That Will Not Be Blamed For Nothing

The Worst Sideshow Ever

The bearded lady is a man in a dress
Docker’s arms and a stubbly chest
The dog faced boy is a puppy in a pram
The astounding blob a slightly overweight man
The giant is a bloke standing on a box
Wearing a really long coat
The push me-pull you is a stag’s head
Strapped to the arse of a goat
It’s the worst sideshow ever
It’s the worst sideshow ever
Have you ever seen a worse one?
NEVER!
It’s the worst sideshow ever
The collection of pickled punks floating in their jars
Well it’s just pickled gherkins with fake eyes and ears
A girl with a built up shoe
She wandered in one day
They told her she was a natural
And persuaded her to stay
It’s the worst sideshow ever
It’s the worst sideshow ever
Have you ever seen a worse one?
NEVER!
It’s the worst sideshow ever
The ex military amputee
He lost both legs below the knee
He uses his stumps for cricket
Calls himself the human wicket
(How's that?!)
Lady caterpillar is a girl in a sleeping bag
She looks so bored as she wriggles round the floor
It makes me aaaghh aaaaghh AAAAGHHH
It’s the worst sideshow ever
It’s the worst sideshow ever
Have you ever seen a worse one?
NEVER!
It’s the worst sideshow ever
The worst sideshow ever
A total waste of cash
The worst sideshow ever
Demand your money back!