| When I was young, I used to be,
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| As fine a man as ever you’d see,
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| 'til the Prince of Wales, he said to me,
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| Come and join the British army.
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| Too-ra loo-ra loo-ra loo,
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| They’re lookin' for monkeys up in the zoo,
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| And since when have I had a face like you?
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| I’d join the British army.
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| Sarah Comden baked a cake,
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| It’s all for poor old Slattery’s sake,
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| She threw meself into the lake,
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| Pretendin' I was balmy.
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| Too-ra loo-ra loo-ra loo,
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| I’ve made me mind up what to do,
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| Now I’ll work me ticket home to you,
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| And *pfft* the British army.
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| Sergeant Heeley went away,
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| And his wife got in the family way,
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| And the only words that she could say,
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| Was blame the British army.
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| Too-ra loo-ra loo-ra loo,
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| Me curse upon the Labour blue,
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| That took me darlin' boy from me,
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| To join the British army.
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| Corporal Sheen’s a turn o' the 'bout,
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| Just give him a couple o' jars o' stout,
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| He’ll bake the enemy with his mouth,
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| And save the British army.
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| Too-ra loo-ra loo-ra loo,
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| I’ve made me mind up what to do,
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| Now I’ll work me ticket home to you,
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| And *pluck* the British army. |