| Listen very carefully
|
| I’ll say this only once
|
| I haven’t had a moment’s peace
|
| In thirty-seven months
|
| Commitments squeezed like tinned sardines
|
| Into each precious hour
|
| But I’ll survive, 'cause where there’s life
|
| There’s generally a bar
|
| (Line 'em up)
|
| Births and deaths and marriages
|
| Cabbages and kings
|
| Slugs and snails and e-mails
|
| Other precious things
|
| Cherubim and seraphim
|
| Go green with envy for
|
| All the births and deaths and marriages
|
| Mortality affords
|
| Today a man got on my tram
|
| And wiped his sweaty neck
|
| And suddenly, I saw how he
|
| Must look whilst having (sex)
|
| I felt like Henry the Sixth felt
|
| When he sang hysterically
|
| Watching the slaughter his supporters
|
| Thought he ought to see
|
| Births and deaths and marriages
|
| Divorces, christenings
|
| Isn’t life a roll of strife
|
| Round a splendid thing
|
| Cherubim and seraphim
|
| Continually do cry
|
| «Life's wasted on these mortal ones
|
| So can we have a try?"(Yeah)
|
| Here’s a story 'bout a boy
|
| Ignored by all the class
|
| Broke his leg so he could get them
|
| All to sign his cast
|
| But instead of writing «Get well soon»
|
| They wrote «You suck»
|
| A dreadful story, I’m terribly sorry
|
| At least I, made it up
|
| Births and deaths and marriages
|
| Cabbages and kings
|
| Tops and tails and screams and wails
|
| Cheated in between
|
| What the hell? |
| I’m fit and well
|
| I’m able and I’m willing
|
| I’m not from Venus or from Mars
|
| I’m from Enniskillen
|
| So why watch the nation’s «Hundred Greatest Things In History»
|
| When the top spot goes by lot to Bohemian Rhapsody?
|
| You will never see a poor bookie, the dealer always wins
|
| And there ain’t no clocks 'round the Vegas slots
|
| Keep texting your votes in
|
| Goodnight, and may your God go with you |