| Well, we’ve been going together
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| Since the eighth of November
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| And though it seems like forever
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| I very clearly remember
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| You told me on our first date
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| What you’d do on my birthday
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| Well hooray it’s my birthday
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| And frankly, baby, I can’t wait
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| I don’t want to die a virgin
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| The other day I discovered
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| A magazine of my brothers
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| I read it under the covers
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| It got me all hot and bothered
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| Now every time that I see you
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| Your uniform becomes see-through
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| You don’t know how much I need you
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| The 'Handy Andy’s' I’ve been through
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| I don’t want to die a virgin
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| The pines and the cedars rejoice in his fall
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| How are you fallen from heaven?
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| Oh Hellel, star of the morning
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| With all the bombs and the bird-flu
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| We’re probably gonna be dead soon
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| And here we are in your bedroom
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| Oh, did I tell you I love you I love you I love you
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| I can feel your heart beating
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| And your breathing increasing
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| Your folks are out for the evening
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| I really hope I’m not dreaming
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| I don’t want to die a virgin |