| 'I fought hard in the Second World War'
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| You hear them shout
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| No good bragging about the Afrika Korps
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| It was Beadle’s About
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| They dressed you up took you off to World War One
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| Armed you and surrounded you with wire
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| Sat in stinking mud you sung your stupid songs
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| And waited till they told you when to fire
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| 'Cause the rulers always laugh
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| At a video bloodbath
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| Nothing makes them laugh
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| Like a video bloodbath
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| From the First World War to the Yom-Kippur
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| It was Beadle’s About
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| The bayonets slice, the rockets roar
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| And he jumps out
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| Fond memories of the bloody bridge you failed to hold
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| Many of your buddies killed or maimed
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| You would’ve shot at rabbits if that’s what you’d been told
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| Till the General said 'I'm sorry, you’ve been framed'
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| Keep those entries coming
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| Leave those cameras running
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| Keep those entrails coming
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| Leave those soldiers gunning
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| Because you’re sure to get a laugh
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| With a video bloodbath
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| Nothing gets a laugh
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| Like a video bloodbath
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| Here’s a wacky video we got last week
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| A bomb catches Arthur unawares
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| He’s lost both his arms and he can’t see or speak
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| But thank you for the memory you shared |