| You may think a man’s brain stops
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| After he’s been dead and his legs chopped off
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| Well, let me tell you a story to change that belief
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| It started back when I was still alive
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| My girlfriend and I were sitting side by side
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| When she grabbed a gun and rudely ended my life
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| My body lay there, dead and cold
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| When she dragged me down to the basement below
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| Where she decided to stuff me in a cardboard box
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| That’s when her problem did arise
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| You see, the box she chose was to small in size
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| So, she chopped off my legs
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| Just so I could fit my future home
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| Then out of panic or out of stress?
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| She lost my legs, never to be found again
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| Now I cannot die unless my body’s complete
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| So I lay in limbo, in agony, the world’s first zombie amputee
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| First she robbed me of life now she’s robbing me of death
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| So, if you’ve seen my legs, I’d like them back
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| Or has she fed them to her dog and cat?
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| If this is what life is, I don’t want any part of it |