| Better living through fake science
|
| (Welcome to Ru-co labs)
|
| The future is now and it’s freaking me out
|
| (Welcome to Ru-co labs)
|
| They always say consult your doctor before taking a new medicine but what the
|
| hell do they know
|
| Tell it like it is girl
|
| What we got in stock?
|
| (We got tablets, drops, patches, and shots. We got liquids that can take you
|
| from whatever you got. |
| Have a sip, have a slurper, if you can still swallow,
|
| a hand full of promises even though they’re hollow)
|
| Here at Ru-co labs we’ve worked so hard to make these drugs help you with your
|
| strife
|
| So check out these pills we’re tuckin
|
| Cause honey they’re here to give you life
|
| (Welcome to Ru-co labs YAHH!)
|
| O M G
|
| What? |
| what’s wrong?
|
| Boys don’t make passes at queens with flat asses
|
| What can I do about it?
|
| Say goodbye padding and hello to badonkadonk, and it makes yo ass get a lot
|
| humps. |
| It comes in a patch snuffed down by your snatch. |
| If it’s a good batch
|
| then it starts to hatch. |
| Badonkadonk, watch out Jloe, watch out nicki,
|
| watch out Kandy k. |
| Cause we about to break the internet every other day
|
| Got a new power bottom and it’s on display, it’s got its own zip code by the
|
| way 9−0-2−1-
|
| Ohhhh that’s a big old ass
|
| My backside looks like a mountain pass
|
| Badonkadonks now available on the go, in a perky powder that looks a lot like
|
| snow. |
| Put it in your salad or a cold ice tea
|
| But don’t snort it up your nose this ain’t 1983
|
| Badonkadonks
|
| Hey sandy haven’t seen you at the club lately
|
| Yeah well, I spent most of my summer working on my drag race audition
|
| That’s not what I heard, I heard you’ve been poppin out at parties
|
| You don’t mean? |
| SANDY NO!
|
| Used to rule the clubs but now I’m stuck at home, suffering from a case of
|
| restless tuck syndrome. |
| Cause when I see a stud in a tuck that’s cropped,
|
| I can’t get in my drag cause my tuck gets popped!
|
| But now there’s a solution made by Ru-co inc, a handy little pill that makes
|
| your junk shrink
|
| So easy once a month just open up your say awww, when life gets to hard just
|
| take some flaccida
|
| (Flaccida, flaccida)
|
| Flaccida saved my life and now I love it oodles, even around the pit crew I
|
| feel nothing noodles
|
| (Flaccida)
|
| Now illegal in 48 states
|
| Here’s the tee about that old queen on Twitter, you know that hateful bitch
|
| that’s always so bitter, she says that Gaga stole it all from Madonna
|
| What’s next adopting kids from bodswanna
|
| She wears caftans and moo moos, just like a idol, what she have in her gym bag?
|
| Viagra and midol, kids today are down hill post Mariah, and who’s that new girl
|
| names zendaya?
|
| Do you suffer from bitter old queen syndrome? |
| Ru-co labs has a spray for dat.
|
| Trollvada spray a spritz a dab under your old under thigh and soon you’ll be
|
| taking snapchats of your avocado toast
|
| For the love of Cathleen turner what is happening?! |
| HUHH oh my God,
|
| I’m obsessed with Miley’s new single, what’s the new dating app I’m ready to
|
| mingle, I’m gender fluid and not into labels, cutting boards and getting rid of
|
| cable.
|
| I don’t just sit at dinner tables anymore, I flip em. |
| Thanks conflama
|
| (That bitch is crazy)
|
| I haven’t had a sip of wine in three years, why? |
| Because now I throw it in
|
| people’s faces! |
| Thanks conflama
|
| Conflama, it’s conflict plus drama. |
| You know what that equals right?
|
| Dolla signs. |
| It’s what every reality Stars got, conflama I put two teaspoons
|
| in my coffee every morning, good to the last death drop
|
| (Conflama, find a way to pull up tonight. Conflama)
|
| Bitch I’m from Chicago
|
| (Conflama, won’t go home till we start a fight, Conflama)
|
| This ain’t rupauls best friends race
|
| (Conflama)
|
| Go back to party city where you belong
|
| Bitch! |
| The song is over
|
| Don’t you tell me when the song is over!
|
| (Conflama, it’s working!)
|
| What did tinderella say when she got to the ball?
|
| Choking violently
|
| Oh dear tinderella, why are u gaging so?
|
| What could I do, I bit off more than I could chew. |
| It’s my great defect,
|
| I have terminal gag reflex
|
| Feeling stressed, choked a distant, gag reflex is so persistent,
|
| Ru-co labs has a potion you can drink up any ocean!
|
| Now there’s swalloweve |
| (Lalalalalalalala)
|
| Swalloweve
|
| Swalloweve is for princesses 21 and older and does not prevent the spread of
|
| stds, side effects include increased bitchyness, an unquenchable thirst,
|
| lower credit scores, and total austigmization
|
| Thanks to swalloweve I’ll be ready whenever my prince comes
|
| (Swalloweve)
|
| Did you see her shoes?
|
| (Yass qwen)
|
| Aren’t they so tacky?
|
| (Yass qwen)
|
| Can you stop saying that?
|
| (Yass qwen)
|
| I don’t think you can?
|
| (Bitch what do you mean?)
|
| Some queens are so annoying, they’re voices are really cloying
|
| Repeating the same words falling out they’re lips like turds
|
| Oh girl you got Drag mouth, it’s a bit problimary, you need to read a book like
|
| right now, and up your vocabulary. |
| But now there’s a fix when you come and go
|
| south all you gotta do is put this caulk in your mouth
|
| Caulk, as in C-A-U-L-K get your mind out of the gutter
|
| Anyone can use it including straights, bis, and gays. |
| It stops your loose lips
|
| from shouting drag cliches
|
| Side effects include but are not limited to, YASSS QWEN! |
| Damn now I got it.
|
| God God Get a Grip Girl, Okurrrrr
|
| There’s a question, burns deep in my soul. |
| One that you, can only control.
|
| From your lips, to gods ear, there’s an answer we all need to hear.
|
| Tell me is there, an anal option
|
| What’s right for others ain’t right for me, what I’m asking is biology,
|
| Rupaul is there an anal option, for me
|
| (For me, for me, for me, for me, me too)
|
| Five out of four doctors don’t recommend Ru-co labs
|
| So kids just don’t drugs
|
| Just love yoself so you can love somebody else
|
| Can I get an amen?
|
| (Amennnnnn) |