| I don’t care what you say
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| I never liked you anyway
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| Wouldn’t give you the time of day
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| If I had the time to spend
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| You’re malicious and downright cruel
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| Superstitious, so uncool
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| Best wishes, you loudmouthed fool
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| I hope I never see you again
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| You’re a regular jack in the box
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| In your clown suit and your goldilocks
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| The original liar’s paradox, you’ll have to google that
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| How in the hell do you think you’ll make it
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| When the real test comes and you just can’t fake it
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| Your sycophants say they can’t take it and leave you lyin' flat
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| Well you started out in the wild wild west
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| Your tin star pinned to your bulletproof vest
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| I must say we were all impressed — but not as much as you
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| But your horse is drunk and your friends got tired
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| Your aim grew weak and uninspired
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| You robbed a train but your gun misfired
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| Blew a hole right through your shoe
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| Yeah, you’re a regular jack in the box
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| In your clown suit and your goldilocks
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| All duded up in your cowboy crocs, singing the same old song
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| How in the hell do you think you’ll make it
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| When the real test comes and you just can’t fake it
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| Your sycophants say they can’t take it and leave you on your own
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| Now you only rant and rave
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| Piss and moan and misbehave
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| You lost your grip on that flag you wave
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| But you wave it right or wrong
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| They’re still tryin to make amends
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| Maybe win back some of your old friends
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| Real cowboys say the party never ends
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| And the road goes on and on and on… |