| Guess what, ever since the world began | 
| Same plot, everyone’s been dumping on their fellow man | 
| Pounding people they feel better than | 
| I hope you’re taking notes cause | 
| You feel everyone deserves a shot | 
| Get real, some of us have got it, girl | 
| And some got squat | 
| That’s the truth, oh honey, like it or not | 
| I hate to break it to you | 
| My daddy taught me you get nowhere being nice | 
| So now I’m sharing his advice: | 
| The world according to Chris is | 
| Better to strike then get struck | 
| Better to screw then get screwed | 
| You’d probably think it’s bizarre | 
| And that’s the way things are | 
| But that doesn’t mean it has to be that way! | 
| What does it cost to be kind? | 
| Ew, what have you done with my best friend? | 
| My daddy taught me who’s on top and who’s below | 
| And now it’s time I let you know | 
| The world according to Chris is | 
| Better to punch than get punched | 
| Better to burn than get burned | 
| Learn that and you’re gonna go far | 
| Cause that’s the way things are | 
| Ha-na na na na na na na na | 
| Ha-na na na na na na na | 
| Ha-na na na na na na na na | 
| Ha-na na na na na na na | 
| Let’s party, people! | 
| The world according to Chris | 
| The world according to Chris | 
| The world according to Chris | 
| The world according to Chris |