| See it was September 1st, 1999, the day of my death
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| My back was on the cold concrete as I took my last breath
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| I saw my body laying on the ground as my soul hovered above me
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| Damn Eyedea, you was a good looking cat
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| But anyway, another day at eighteen years of age
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| Step into heaven’s gate anxious to see what God got to say
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| Maybe he’ll give me a gift for always saying my prayers
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| But he might send me downstairs for last year’s love affair
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| Well, who cares
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| You know, right now it’s all a mystery
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| I mean, I’ll find out when I get there
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| Until then I can’t let it get to me
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| I’m keeping my cool, besides, everybody dies
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| I’ll just follow the white light like the do in the movies
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| It seems like hours went by and I’m still traveling right towards the brightness
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| Now this ain’t heaven or hell, this realm is lifeless
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| And I hate to say it but this wild goose chase had me bored
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| No directions, no clues, and no *idea* what I was in for
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| But then forward I kept floating
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| And then a quick flash; |
| the lights split directly in half |
| And created a forked path
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| Representing each side was an angel
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| «Now what’s the task I have to untangle to meet the big man in charge?» |
| I ask
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| And the one on the right of me says
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| «One of us always lies, and the other one always tells the truth
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| Ask the right one the right question, and he’ll direct you to heaven
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| But if you ask the wrong one son, farewell you’re going straight to»
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| Well, y’all get the picture
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| The one on my left told me not to listen to his fibs
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| He said, «it ain’t that complicated to find out where God lives»
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| He told me to follow his path and tell God he said hi
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| Then the one on my right jumped in and told me not to believe his lies
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| And I’m like Jesus fucking Christ, I didn’t care much for life
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| But I’ve tried to stay alive forever, if I knew this is what death was like
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| I was never good at problem solving, especially in emergencies
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| I get a tad bit nervous when concerned with burning for eternity
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| But anyways, I asked them which one lied, and they pointed at each other
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| And thinking I had it, I asked the name of my mother |
| One said he don’t know, the other said he know but he can’t tell me
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| Goddamn this is gonna be hard
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| So I asked like thirty questions and I still wasn’t sure
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| But being me I got pissed and gave those pricks a few good words
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| Frustrated with it all
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| I turned my back to the angels and when I walked away
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| To my surprise
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| I found myself in heaven
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| Ya know I’m saying
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| Kinda just turned around from the whole situation
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| Rejecting everything that was going on
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| That’s how I walked into heaven
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| I walked away, walked away, walked straight into heaven
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| I walked away, walked away, walked straight into heaven |