Song information On this page you can find the lyrics of the song History's Greatest Assholes, artist - MC Lars. Album song Lars Attacks!, in the genre Иностранный рэп и хип-хопDate of issue: 05.09.2011
Record label: Horris
Song language: English
History's Greatest Assholes |
| I got a new drum set, I’m testing it out! |
| Look what I can do Mom |
| Yo, so people always remember the good guys but what up with the villains? |
| I’ve compiled a list of my favorite ones in rap form for you, here we go, |
| the greatest assholes in more or less chronological order |
| Here’s a list of famous assholes, let’s start with this dude |
| Named Cain, killed his brother and that was just rude |
| Brutus & Cassius were jerks — just a little |
| Nero was no hero, Rome burned, he played the fiddle |
| Caligula could give you a night to remember |
| Ghengis Khan might tie you up and lacerate your member |
| And when it came to ballers there was Vlad the Impaler |
| He’d run a stake up through you out your mouth to make you holler! |
| It’s no mystery, history remembers |
| Pirates pillaging and villagers dismembered |
| Vikings on a quest in their dragon shape boats |
| Running up on castles, jumping over moats |
| Christopher Columbus rolled up with a fungus |
| Pizarro and Cortes made the natives all say «um this… |
| One-sided exchange is not that nice!» |
| Like Henry the VIII beheading wife after wife |
| History’s greatest assholes, history’s greatest assholes |
| History’s greatest assholes, I’m calling you out, I’m calling you out! |
| History’s greatest assholes, history’s greatest assholes |
| History’s greatest assholes, I’m smoking you out, we’re smoking you out! |
| Benedict Arnold & Oliver Cromwell |
| Napoleon Bonaparte all wish it had gone well |
| With blown apart plans like Andrew Jackson |
| A Trail of Tears dividing families like fractions |
| Jack the Ripper had bad morals — like Lenin |
| Stalin killed 20 million and sent them all to heaven |
| Or hell, I don’t know but one thing is for certain |
| So many Russian people murdered behind an Iron Curtain |
| Gavrilo Princip shot Franz Ferdinand |
| Which lead to World War I and a famous Scottish Band |
| Which lead to World War II and freaking bodies everywhere |
| At the Holocaust museum there’s a wall of shoes and hair |
| On a rainy day in Amsterdam — tell me why |
| I saw Anne Frank House — and it made me cry |
| So whistle while you work, Hitler was jerk |
| Mussolini was a weenie, assholes got some nerve! |
| GAME SHOW HOST: Okay Lars, the turn goes to you |
| LARS: I’ll take compassionate athletes for $ 500 Alex |
| HOST: This football player is also known as a strong advocate of animal rights |
| LARS: Who is Michael Vick? |
| HOST: I’m sorry Lars, but that is incorrect |
| LARS: Damn! |
| Mengele was sick, with that scientific research |
| Lamps of human skin blood up on his t-shirt |
| Pol Pot, Ho Chi Minh, Idi Amin |
| All up in the jungle acting real mean |
| Mark David Chapman shot a Beatle on the street |
| James Earl Ray killed Martin Luther King |
| Manson crashed parties and painted the town |
| (The Zodiac killer has yet to be found.) |
| It’s an inside job trading junk bonds and derivatives |
| Systematic risk, Wall Street greed is quite indicative |
| 20 billion in the bank, but y’all kept on spending |
| Killing our economy with subprime lending |
| Vince Offer slapchopped a hooker in the face |
| John Mayer said very awkward things about his race |
| Charlie Sheen… Wait hold up, everyone’s rapping about |
| Charlie Sheen right now and it’s played out and boring |
| And whack so I’m going to skip this part |
| Biff Tannen well actually, his whole family |
| I’m speaking candidly like Colmes and Hannity |
| It’s insanity, they rapin' everybody |
| We tune in when it’s shocking and we tune when it’s bloody |
| Mel Gibson hittin' women thinkin' he can get away like OJ |
| Oh wait what would Dr. Laura say? |
| Okay, no way, yo I almost forgot |
| George W. Bush, you got the number one spot! |