| I got a new drum set, I’m testing it out! |
| Look what I can do Mom
|
| Yo, so people always remember the good guys but what up with the villains?
|
| I’ve compiled a list of my favorite ones in rap form for you, here we go,
|
| the greatest assholes in more or less chronological order
|
| Here’s a list of famous assholes, let’s start with this dude
|
| Named Cain, killed his brother and that was just rude
|
| Brutus & Cassius were jerks — just a little
|
| Nero was no hero, Rome burned, he played the fiddle
|
| Caligula could give you a night to remember
|
| Ghengis Khan might tie you up and lacerate your member
|
| And when it came to ballers there was Vlad the Impaler
|
| He’d run a stake up through you out your mouth to make you holler!
|
| It’s no mystery, history remembers
|
| Pirates pillaging and villagers dismembered
|
| Vikings on a quest in their dragon shape boats
|
| Running up on castles, jumping over moats
|
| Christopher Columbus rolled up with a fungus
|
| Pizarro and Cortes made the natives all say «um this…
|
| One-sided exchange is not that nice!»
|
| Like Henry the VIII beheading wife after wife
|
| History’s greatest assholes, history’s greatest assholes
|
| History’s greatest assholes, I’m calling you out, I’m calling you out!
|
| History’s greatest assholes, history’s greatest assholes
|
| History’s greatest assholes, I’m smoking you out, we’re smoking you out!
|
| Benedict Arnold & Oliver Cromwell
|
| Napoleon Bonaparte all wish it had gone well
|
| With blown apart plans like Andrew Jackson
|
| A Trail of Tears dividing families like fractions
|
| Jack the Ripper had bad morals — like Lenin
|
| Stalin killed 20 million and sent them all to heaven
|
| Or hell, I don’t know but one thing is for certain
|
| So many Russian people murdered behind an Iron Curtain
|
| Gavrilo Princip shot Franz Ferdinand
|
| Which lead to World War I and a famous Scottish Band
|
| Which lead to World War II and freaking bodies everywhere
|
| At the Holocaust museum there’s a wall of shoes and hair
|
| On a rainy day in Amsterdam — tell me why
|
| I saw Anne Frank House — and it made me cry
|
| So whistle while you work, Hitler was jerk
|
| Mussolini was a weenie, assholes got some nerve!
|
| GAME SHOW HOST: Okay Lars, the turn goes to you
|
| LARS: I’ll take compassionate athletes for $ 500 Alex
|
| HOST: This football player is also known as a strong advocate of animal rights
|
| LARS: Who is Michael Vick?
|
| HOST: I’m sorry Lars, but that is incorrect
|
| LARS: Damn!
|
| Mengele was sick, with that scientific research
|
| Lamps of human skin blood up on his t-shirt
|
| Pol Pot, Ho Chi Minh, Idi Amin
|
| All up in the jungle acting real mean
|
| Mark David Chapman shot a Beatle on the street
|
| James Earl Ray killed Martin Luther King
|
| Manson crashed parties and painted the town
|
| (The Zodiac killer has yet to be found.)
|
| It’s an inside job trading junk bonds and derivatives
|
| Systematic risk, Wall Street greed is quite indicative
|
| 20 billion in the bank, but y’all kept on spending
|
| Killing our economy with subprime lending
|
| Vince Offer slapchopped a hooker in the face
|
| John Mayer said very awkward things about his race
|
| Charlie Sheen… Wait hold up, everyone’s rapping about
|
| Charlie Sheen right now and it’s played out and boring
|
| And whack so I’m going to skip this part
|
| Biff Tannen well actually, his whole family
|
| I’m speaking candidly like Colmes and Hannity
|
| It’s insanity, they rapin' everybody
|
| We tune in when it’s shocking and we tune when it’s bloody
|
| Mel Gibson hittin' women thinkin' he can get away like OJ
|
| Oh wait what would Dr. Laura say?
|
| Okay, no way, yo I almost forgot
|
| George W. Bush, you got the number one spot! |
Song information On this page you can read the lyrics of the song History's Greatest Assholes , by - MC Lars. Song from the album Lars Attacks!, in the genre Иностранный рэп и хип-хоп